


Making Love is Complex

by heybabe34



Category: Love-Com, Lovely Complex (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Comedy, F/M, First Time, Masturbation, Oral, Romance, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:35:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 40,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26579956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heybabe34/pseuds/heybabe34
Summary: (MATURE) Risa Koizumi and Atsushi Otani are dating, with Otani away at college and Koizumi home going to a technical school finding time to spend alone can be difficult. Plus, even though they have been together for a while, they've been pretty vanilla; but, they both want to do more. So, will they be able to make time and take their relationship to the next level?((Posted here and on Fanfiction.net))
Relationships: Koizumi Risa/Ootani Atsushi
Comments: 21
Kudos: 40





	1. Chapter 1

A/N: Alright, this story starts off slow, but will eventually cross into MATURE subjects. So, if you're a child or not comfortable with that don't read. I'll put warnings at the front of specifically explicit chapters. Chapter one is pretty tame, the only warning would be slight mention/hinting of sexual things (ie. Masturbation).

Throughout the fic: No mention of r*pe, except for the topic of consent (not in Chapter 1)

Also, just for a base. Otani is in college. Koizumi is studying fashion at a technical school. I was inspired by the fic "Sexy Complex" on, so there will probably be some similarities, go read that if you're searching for explicit/mature Lovely Complex stories. I haven't finished the manga yet, so some later events might be missing (and appear as I finish the manga). Haha, enjoy!

Risa Koizumi POV

After hanging out all afternoon, Otani and I went back to his dorm room. I only got to visit him at his school on the weekends. We were both super busy during the week, him more than me, but we don't have to talk about that… Anyway, we were sitting there on the ground, leaning up against the side of his bunk bed.

The door was cracked open, with a door stopper. His two other roommates were out, but he had told me they could be back at any time. Sometimes they stay out all night at parties, but sometimes they 'strike-out' and come home early.

When he told me that, Otani laughed casually. I couldn't help but thinking though… Wasn't he technically striking out too?

On the floor, my legs were stretched out, almost to the point where they were touching the bed across from us. I had been in his room once or twice now, but only to stop by and get him to go do stuff. Anytime I had been in here, his roommates were there too.

I looked up at the ceiling, "It's so small in here, huh?"

"I guess." Otani muttered.

I brought my head back down, seeing his legs folded over each other and his hands in his lap.

"So that karaoke place was fun, not as good as our one at home though," I rambled on, "Definitely not as much Umibozu."

"No." I watched him play with his fingers.

"Otani?" I asked. He looked up at me. "Are you ok?"

His face loosened up, "Yeah, yeah." He scratched the back of his neck and chuckled, "You're gonna laugh at me, and the moments totally ruined, but I was just waiting for a good time to…"

He trailed off, put his hand on the ground, and leaned up to me. I watched his face get closer. My lips parted a little. He pressed his lips on mine and I shut my eyes.

Man, I love him so much.

He broke away quickly. His eyes shot to the door. He turned back to me, seriously. "I'm worried though."

I was a bit confused, "About what?"

He rolled his eyes, "My roommates…" He shifted, "...they could be back any minute remember?!"

"Oh," I slipped out. "I don't care if they see us…" I suddenly felt my face getting hot and flushed, "...kissing."

Otani nodded as he leaned back on the side of his bed. His hand slid a little bit closer to mine, but I was probably the only one to notice. "Okay, I know but, I don't want them to get the wrong idea."

Oh. I thought, keeping my feelings inside. He doesn't like me like that yet.

"It's okay. We don't have to do anything. Let's play a game or something." I went to stand up. "What do you have here? Anything good?"

He took my hand, "No."

"Huh?" I questioned, kinda disappointed, "You don't have any good games?"

He frowned, staring into my eyes. "No, sit back down."

Now I was definitely confused. I mean, listen, Otani kisses me. I am pretty sure he likes me, but still, sometimes I'm really unsure. We're boyfriend and girlfriend, but our dates are pretty much the same kinds of things we did as friends. We have been dating for at least half a year now, but… well… That must mean he's still having trouble with the whole attraction part. What I'm trying to say is, I guess, I have heard other guys talk about girls they like or are interested in and things they want to do, but I'm just not so sure Otani would ever want to do those things with me.

I probably don't excite him that much. But, I'm happy just being with him.

Slowly, I sat back down, almost out of spite. "Okay…" I said blankly.

He sat up, facing me, in a kind of squad. One of his hands moved on to the bedpost.

He stared at me. Intensely.

"Koizumi," he stated, "I don't know if I'll be able to hang out as much next weekend."

…

"Huh?" I blinked twice, looking out at the man before me, inches away.

"Yeah," His face turned the slightest bit of red, "I have a big exam that Monday, so I might need to study the whole time-"

I really attempted to cut him off. I grabbed his shoulder, "Otani, it's ok. I know you need to study. I'll be sad that we can't see each other, but if we could maybe even a little that'd be fine."

"Okay," he looked down at me and I could see the disappointment in his eyes. He leaned down, bringing himself closer to me, "I'll try." His hand slid behind my neck as he wrapped his arms around me.

I hugged him back tightly.

"-Otani," I spoke his name into the air, and I wanted to keep talking. I wanted to gush on and on about how much I loved him. Especially now in moments like these when he hugged me and got concerned for me.

He beat me to it, he whispered near my ear, "Tell me if you hear them come in."

Otani pulled away from our hug. He put his arms against the side of the bed, above my shoulders. He bent down and kissed me, planting his lips on mine.

This felt heated. More passionate than our little kisses before. Maybe not as special as the first time he surprise kissed me. But, it felt intimate and intense. And it lasted for what seemed like forever. Without letting up, Otani shifted his weight from one leg to the other. I could feel his body getting closer to mine.

I leaned into him.

I brought one of my legs up and turned my body to his. We were practically touching.

He moved a hand from the bedside onto the side of my neck. I think I might have made a little sound when he did.

I felt his lips part and his tongue lightly roll over my bottom lip. Oh my. I didn't know what to do.

His tongue went back and he put his lips back together. I didn't want him to leave.

I grabbed the back of his head, sliding my fingers into his air.

With that, he was back, pressing his lips harder against mine.

What was happening?

I leaned up more and I even pushed Otani down, gripping strains of his hair.

His mouth opened up against mine, and this time parted my lips in response. I felt my chest brush up against his torso, and then he—

"Koizumi!" He broke away, jerking his head back.

"What? What?!" I looked around, concerned and scattered, "Did you hear something?!"

When I looked at him, his eyes were wide. He had moved a distance away from me. He simply stated, "I have to go to the bathroom." Then rushed out of the dorm room through the crack in the door.

And I sat there, at a loss for words.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Leave a comment/follow. The next chapter is getting posted right away and I have the next few ready.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Warnings: Slight sexual mentions.

A/N: Also I have like no experience with AO3 so my bold and italics have just disappeared. If you ever see like a single word in a paragraph that was probably italicized. Sorry!

Risa Koizumi POV

I rested my hand on my head.

What happened? How did that go wrong?

I thought that we were really heating things up. I mean, I was feeling some type of way. I wanted to keep kissing him like that.

Or maybe we were even making out~~

Great. I messed it all up somehow. I mean, god, he ran out of the room. I guess I didn't deal with that whole tongue thing right. Maybe I'm not supposed to do it back, but then again I didn't even bring my tongue out yet. All I did was open my mouth a little.

That grossed him out?!

As I sat, alone, on the ground of Otani's college dorm room, I realized how uncomfortable I was. Standing up, I stretched out. My back hurt from leaning up against the bed and sitting on the cheap tile floor.

I let out a big sigh, feeling disappointed in myself. Especially, feeling bad about my making out abilities. Otani was my boyfriend. We have been dating for a while. And it's not like I am comfortable with full on, going all the way just yet but, but, I would like to do a little bit more. I guess. Maybe.

But it seems like… it's as if he…

Doesn't even like me in that kind of way.

I crashed down on his bed, in defeat. He had the bottom bunk of a two-person bunk bed, so I was a little glad I didn't have to climb up to have my own dramatic moment.

I slouched over, and I don't know why but, suddenly I began to cry.

What's taking him so long?

I sobbed into my hands.

Did he leave me? Does he dislike me that much?

I heard the door crack open and someone step through.

My head jilted up, tears running down my face.

Otani stood there, his face a little wet, like he had splashed it or washed it off. His eyes narrowed at me.

"Koizumi?!" His expression turned to concern, "Are you crying?"

I turned away from him, embarrassed.

I mean, gosh, he's gotta see my crying again after he so clearly finds me unattractive.

He rushed over, beside me, "Wh-why are you crying? What happened? Did you bump your head?"

He looked at the top bunk above me.

I shook my head violently, "No! I didn't hit my head!" I whined.

He sat down next to me, placing a hand near my leg. I glanced down at it between my fingers and through my tears.

"Then what's wrong?" He asked, nicely.

Frustrated, I answered him, crying out like a child, "You don't like me!"

He didn't respond for a good few seconds, then he said plainly, "What?"

I yelled back, "Why else would you run away in the middle of kissing me? I must be the worst kisser or something right? It's ok, you can just tell me- I can take it!" I matched his eyes for a second, then let out a heavy sob into my hands again.

He laughed but tried to hide it. He covered his mouth with the back of his hand and laughed into his wrist. "Koizumi," he mumbled under the annoying fact he was finding my misery funny.

I continued crying, "You don't like me it! It's okay, you don't have to say it. We've been dating for a while now and we haven't… well I should've known huh, I'm sorry Otani!"

He couldn't contain himself any longer, "Koizumi!" His hand grabbed mine, pulling it away from my tears. I looked out at him, pouting, but waiting to hear what he had to say.

I can take it.

"Koizumi…" he looked to the side, avoiding eye contact with me, and said lightly, "You really have no idea what you do to me."

Huh?

Then he chuckled and turned back, looking me in the eyes, "It's kinda funny."

His wide smile just made me more depressed. "What do you mean? Why's this funny?"

He leaned back on the bed and laughed again, "Sorry Koizumi, I didn't know you were feeling this way, but can you really blame me when you're still so innocent."

What?

I squinted at him. What was he talking about?

He tried to explain, but we weren't always the best at communication, "I didn't 'run away' because I don't like you," he chuckled and crossed one of his legs over the other, "It's quite the opposite actually."

Getting kind of angry, I placed my hands down on the bed and leaned closer to him, "What? That makes no sense!"

He laughed with a big smirk, unbothered, "See, Koizumi? You're still so innocent."

He stood up, getting past me. He glanced back at me, then appeared to be thinking to himself for a second.

Slowly, and a bit creepily if I'm honest, he turned back around to face me. His hand on his chin, Otani asked me, "Koizumi… just to be clear… so I'm not misunderstanding you or anything, you are saying you want to… um… take things, uh, in or relationship a little bit further?"

I blushed and balked out of fear, "Huh? What? Uh… I mean yeah, maybe a very little bit. Not a lot. Like this much," I squinted and held my hand out in front of me, almost about pinching my thumb and pointer finger together to demonstrate.

Nervously, I looked back at Otani. He was so hard to read, but he seemed a little happy, or maybe the right word was content.

"Okay. I'll keep that in mind. Come let me walk you to the train station." He motioned for me to get up, then started walking out the door.

"Wait Otani!" I chased after him, "Do you?"

He stopped just outside of the door. I peeked my head through and he questioned me, "Do I what?"

"Do you want to go a little further?" I asked him.

He nodded, looked at me out of the corner of his eye, and said like it was obvious, "Well, yeah."

I groaned.

His tone got a little more serious. He looked down at the ground. "But Koizumi, I would never do something you don't want to do, okay?" He stared up at me. "I mean it."

"Okay." I accepted.

"Let's go," he shrugged and took his hand in mine, letting him lead the way to the train station so I could go back home.

When I finally got home, and the door to my bedroom shut behind me, I couldn't help but do a little dance. I flopped on my bed, with my arms spread out wide. I was so happy. I couldn't explain why. I mean, nothing that great really happened right?

But, Otani said I did things to him, whatever that meant I figured it had to be good. And, and, now we were going to take things a little further… I was so excited, if not completely nervous and terrified. I calmed myself down knowing that nothing was going to happen next weekend, so there was no use worrying about what we would and wouldn't do just yet.

Instead, I just smiled and held my hands close to my heart.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Leave a comment/follow!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the Kudos!

Chapter Warnings: Slight sexual mentions and masturbating. Sexual terms (ie. sex, breasts)

Atsushi Otani's POV

All the time now my life was filled with two things: studying and work. I worked part-time. And when I wasn't working, I was going to school. And when I wasn't going to school, I was studying. I felt completely overworked. I had never tried this hard.

But, I knew that I had to if I wanted to achieve my goals of becoming a basketball coach and teacher. So, I sucked it up.

However, when I studied alone in my room, I wore the stupid headband my girlfriend Koizumi made me. Not the whole outfit, in case someone actually saw me. I'd be mortified. It made me feel better, just knowing she supported me so much. I wished I could pay her back some way, but instead all my time was getting taken away by work.

Like I said I would, I found a little time to spend with her this weekend. On Sunday, we went out to lunch, but even though I might have wanted her to, she didn't come back to my dorm room. And we didn't hang out the rest of the afternoon. I felt like shit having to walk her back so early… especially after… After what we had talked about last time.

When she was over last weekend, in my dorm room when no one else was there—

Sitting at my desk, I stared back down at my work intensely. I had to stay focused. I could think about Koizumi after I passed my exam tomorrow.

But I really did want to think about her more… I kept my mind in the zone though, until I started getting ready for bed. My two roommates were both back in the room. I grabbed a change of clothes and a towel and told them, "I gonna go shower."

Up on his bunk, one of my roommates nodded and from his desk, the other gave me an, "Okay."

I headed for the bathroom and started up the shower once I was in the stall.

I pulled the curtain shut and took off my clothes. I closed my eyes and let the water hit my face for a minute. Then I allowed my mind to wander.

"You don't like me! Why else would you run away in the middle of kissing me?!"

That's what she had said. Wow, Koizumi really was the biggest idiot. I knew she was innocent, but I didn't think she'd be that clueless. I guess I must have been that good at hiding it. I had to run to the bathroom to save myself the embarrassment of having her see.

But, maybe not.

When I asked her if she would be okay with taking things a little further, and I hope she understood that I meant doing more sexual things than just kissing (which I still liked don't get me wrong)... she said, "Yeah."

She did add-in, "maybe a very little bit." But, I guess I'll take that. Koizumi was a good girlfriend, as much as I'd never admit that to her, or anyone else for that matter.

I knew she loved me a ton and I probably could have gotten her to do things a lot earlier if I really wanted, but I didn't want to treat her like that. I kinda know I treat her like crap sometimes. I mean, I'm almost never nice to her in public, we're always bickering, and I haven't really told her I love- But, then again, we have a ton of fun. And I'd hang out with her all the time if I could. I don't mind paying for shit we do like getting food or karaoke or arcades. I wouldn't care if she never felt like it was the right time to have sex with me. And I didn't want to force myself on her, especially if she wasn't ready.

Not to mention I probably wouldn't know how to start that whole encounter. It probably would be better if we took things slower.

But recently— who am I kidding?

For kind of a while now, I have been feeling the urge to do more we're Koizumi. I have a pretty hard time telling her how I feel, and I realize that I can hurt her feelings sometimes. It's just not me to scream from the rooftops about how much I love someone. I have been wanting a way to show Koizumi how I feel.

Plus, last weekend, alone in my room, she didn't have to press up against me like that. It was way too hot.

I put my arm on the shower wall and rested my head against it, my face out of the water. I moved my hand down past my stomach and touched myself. I held my penis loosely.

I'd be prepared if Koizumi wasn't ready. I told myself.

I looked down at myself, then shut my eyes, moving my hand a little.

I started to wonder what it would be like. What would we do? There was so much I wanted to do.

I loved her so much. I wanted to show her somehow, because I could actually never say it out loud.

Risa Koizumi POV

Today I spent the afternoon and the majority of the night talking on the phone with Nobuko. My parents were definitely going to scream at me about the phone bill, but maybe I could blame some of it on my brother.

Nobuko was missing her "darling" Nakao, them being separated and all. I was kinda bummed out. I only got to spend an hour or so with Otani today, but I tried to keep that on the down-low, so Nobuko wouldn't get even sadder about her love situation.

Instead, I started drifting our conversation more and more to what Otani and I have mentioned last weekend. Or more accurately what was not mentioned.

At some point, I absent-mindedly asked her, "Now tell me why in the middle of making out Otani would suddenly stop and run away?"

I could hear Nobuko laughing on the other end, which made me madder, but I continued trying to explain.

"He said it wasn't because he didn't like me… or I guess he didn't say that exactly, but he told me-" I put on my best Otani impression, "You really have no idea what you do to me."

"Risa…" Nobuko said slowly, like she was my disappointed mother, "Do you really not know?"

"Not know what?" I quipped back. "I'm confused…Because then later, and maybe then too, we started talking about going further in our relationship."

Nobuko was laughing at me again, "Risa, did Otani go to the bathroom when he ran off?"

"Huh?" I looked into my phone, then pressed it back to my ear, "How did you know that?"

"And we're things really heating up when you guys were kissing?" She asked. I thought she was being kinda nosy, but she's my best friend so I answered obviously.

"Yeah… But I don't see what that has to do with anything-"

"Risa!" She shouted dramatically, "Don't be clueless! Otani got too excited and he didn't want you to see."

I double blinked, "Too excited…?" I thought for a minute, trying to figure out what that could mean. I know that our kissing session felt good for me. I mean, I wanted it to keep going. For us to just keep getting closer. But, when he broke away like that I thought for sure he must have been freaked out. Like we were going too fast. Was Nobuko saying it was the opposite?

"Nobuko? Do you mean he was like…" I shifted my eyes around my room, making sure the coast was clear, and I whispered into the phone, "...turned on?"

She sighed, relieved, "Yes! That must have been it's Risa!"

"So what? He stopped kissing me and went to the bathroom and—" I suddenly connected the dots mid-sentence.

Nobuko agreed along with me, "Uh-huh."

"No really? He didn't, did he?!" I felt weirded out just picturing it.

"He definitely did," she reassured me.

"You mean he… masturbated?" I asked in such a hushed tone, not wanting anyone to hear me.

Nobuko screamed on the other end, "Duh!"

"Oh! Gross!" I winced.

"It's not gross, Risa! It's totally normal. It makes sense he got turned on in a steamy makeout sesh with you! But he knew he couldn't do anything right then, so he took care of it away from you. He was probably embarrassed it even happened!"

I covered my eyes, "I know I get it! Stop! I don't wanna think about it!"

Nobuko quieted down, speaking softly, "Risa, have you ever, touched yourself?"

I freaked, "What?! No!"

"But I thought you wanted to go a little farther with Otani, so what does that mean for you?"

Hm I hadn't thought of that.

"I don't know," I replied, "I just want to do what makes him happy. But I never thought he wanted that kind of stuff and then he's like," I mocked his voice, "oh yeah of course' when I asked if he'd like to go further too." I paused for a moment, "So, I don't know, thinking of how I felt kissing him this time… I'm thinking maybe I just want to keep doing things that feel good."

She let out a slow breath, "Then, and please don't take this the wrong way, but, then you should experiment a little. Figure out what you like."

I sat up, "But Nobu I thought you were against that kind of thing, I mean, weren't you mad when Nakao had a magazine with that kind of stuff."

She defended herself, "No! That's totally different. That was because it was other girls! Not because he was jerking off."

"Wait…" my mind wandered, "Do you Nobu?"

"What.

"Do you… touch yourself?"

She answered easily, unbothered, "Yes, sometimes. More now than before, because Darling and I are apart."

"I'm so confused, but how then—?"

Her voice got a bit tense, "Risa! You don't have to look at porn or magazines. I just think of my Darling! I'll picture him dressed up or at the beach on a private island or naked or something to get myself going and then the rest is easy!"

I protested lightly, "But Nobuko, it's not like I can just picture Otani that way."

"Well, whatever makes you feel good is fine. But seriously Risa, I'd suggest doing a little something before your first time."

My first time?!

I bulked, "What? My first time?! Who said anything about that. I just wanted to maybe press our chests together or wrap my legs around him— I'm not ready for all that!"

She giggled. "Okay, that's alright. I'm just saying maybe someday you will be ready, and it would be helpful for you and him for you to have an idea of what you like."

I thought for a while. I contemplated for maybe the first time if I ever wanted to have sex with Otani. Maybe I was just a little girl still. He was in college now, I was in technical school. We were at a pretty normal age to be doing this kind of stuff and it was barely on my mind.

I do want to be closer to him though.

I sighed. I wanted to make him happy too, of course, but I couldn't help but feeling this little hint of selfishness and doubt. Like maybe he didn't want to have sex with me either, or ever, I don't know. Was I the one forcing him to do stuff he wasn't ready for? I know he said he'd never do that to me. I love him so much, I would never do that to him either. He had to know that.

"Nobu," I spoke nervously, "What was your first time like? Was it scary?"

"Scary…" She trailed off, "No, not exactly, but I was really nervous. Darling and I didn't really decide right away that it was going to happen, but my grandma wasn't home one time when we were hanging out after school. And I don't know Risa one thing led to another and it happened. I was kinda freaked out and nervous and stuff, but so was Darling. We got through it together. And I knew he was always there with me, so it couldn't have really been that scary, you know?"

She asked me, but I didn't know how to respond.

"It doesn't have to happen all at once, Risa. Darling and I have been dating for a long time. Almost 4 years now. It's okay if you need to take some time. I'm sure Otani—"

"Yeah," I answered, "He already told me."

"Told you what?"

I chuckled, "Nothing. Thanks for talking to me Nobu. I'll really take your advice, it means a lot. I'm sorry that I'm so clueless when it comes to this stuff."

She laughed, "Well, that's why you keep me around, to poison your innocence!"

"I'll call you tomorrow after my classes!" I told her.

"Okay bye," she almost hung up, "Have fun!" She teased then dropped the call before I could react.

Have fun?

Did she really think I was going to just hang up the phone and start… masturbating? I wasn't some perverted freak. I can't believe Nobuko just admitted that to me so casually, but I guess it makes some sense, her boyfriend being gone at all.

Who am I kidding though? I have been seeing my boyfriend at least once every weekend since he started college, and we haven't done anything like sex. Maybe I was just the weirdo.

What if Otani expected this stuff from me?

Well, he could've asked…

I let out a long sigh. I flopped backward onto my bed and stared up at the ceiling. Little glow in the dark stars, dim from being about ten years old, were taped to the top of my childhood room. I was only going to technical school, so I was not actually away for college.

For a moment I covered my eyes and started getting all in my head.

I couldn't… not here, in my bedroom…

I groaned, getting frustrated.

I wouldn't even know where to start.

Then, I remembered what Nobuko had mentioned. She always thinks about Nakao when she- touches herself. Maybe I could picture Otani if I ever did something similar, but what would that even look like? I haven't seen him naked, without any clothes on. I mean, I've seen him at the beach but that's not like sexy~

Would I even be into his naked body?

Oh my god. Ew.

I shook my head violently and tried to get the image out of my brain. It was not that Otani was gross to me or anything. In fact, I liked him very much and found him attractive. I mean, sometimes. He had his good moments.

Like when his hair was pinned back because he was playing basketball, and I stole the ball away or went around someone to take a shot or something. He looked really cool then.

Sometimes when he was really deep in thought. Or when he makes some dumb, stupid poses for me to take pictures of. Or when he grabbed my hand to stop me and tell me something serious. Or when… right after he kissed me, when the first thing my eyes saw was his face, all flushed.

Or when he came running to me at Christmas that first time.

Otani was really hot. Especially when he was being nice to me.

I relaxed. I let out slow breaths and calmed down. It wasn't fair of me to make such a harsh judgment call about Otani. I realized at that moment I probably would like his body, no matter what it looked like. All I really cared about was him, for who he was.

It didn't matter if he was short. It didn't matter if I could carry him through the school hallways in my arms during high school. Since then, I always knew I liked him.

Still- Picturing him naked was a bit too far of a step for me. Maybe, like Nobuko was saying, that kind of image does… uh… do it for me. Maybe I had to think of something else while I…

I lifted my head up. I checked that my door was closed.

Then, laying back down, I shut my eyes. My hand crept down to my chest. I rubbed a little bit, but I wouldn't dare go farther than that. This felt scandalous enough.

I thought about all of the wonderful times I have had with Otani. All the images and memories I have kept in my head for years. Him smiling at me. Him focused during basketball, and even him sad about what was happening with his ex-girlfriend. All these times I kept close to my heart. I really loved Otani. And I knew I said it all the time, but I just wished he knew how much I have always cared about him.

Taking my hand off of my body, I reached for my phone on my bedside table. I flipped it open and texted Otani.

Risa: Good luck on your exam!

I held the phone to my heart. I felt happy. Even though I realized I wimped out of everything Nobuko probably wanted me to do. In that minute, I was satisfied with where I was at. I'm a late bloomer, so what?

After about five minutes, my phone lit up and buzzed. I glanced down at the front screen, he texted me back.

Otani: Thanks, but stop bugging me.

With a little giggle, I tossed my phone to the side and got up off my bed. I hated how nuts I was about him. I hated how I would have to get through the entire week before I could see him again. But, I had decided. Next time I see him, I'll try to experiment a little. Maybe it would be easier with him. After all, what was the point of experiencing new things if Otani wasn't right there with me?


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Warnings: Reference to masturbating.

Atsushi Otani's POV

The endlessly long week passed, and I managed to pass my exam. At least I hoped I did. We didn't get our grades back yet, but I felt good about it. Like there was basically no way I failed, right?

Anyway, I desperately wanted to make up for last weekend when I was busy studying. I bet Koizumi was pretty disappointed, even though she wouldn't straight up tell me that. We weren't living that far apart, not like Nakao and Nobuko, but still, we had rough schedules. It was a lot easier to see each other when we had to interact at school whether we liked it or not.

Some days I really dreaded coming face to face with Koizumi. It's funny now to think about it, but I can't help but feel bad for the times I really hurt her feelings. Like after I finally figured out I was the guy she had a crush on, god, that was so awkward. She avoided me so hard after that.

Even then though, Koizumi was someone I always felt I could talk to. Letting her down easy, or I guess just right out rejecting her, was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Harder than a boring exam or a losing basketball game.

The way she took it, saying we should just go back to being a comedy duo, really surprised me. Somewhere in there, I knew she was upset, but she did have to be so nice about it.

It feels like since then I have always been trying to figure Koizumi out, which speaking of, was definitely a losing game.

Friday night, once my classes had finished for the day and I was pretty sure Koizumi's were over too, I gave her a call.

It rang twice. I held my phone to my ear, sitting at the desk in my dorm room. One of my roommates was up on his bed, the other was out- I guess? He wasn't in here, to say the least.

She picked up, "Hello?"

"Hey, how's it going?" I tried to talk smoothly, putting on a cool guy voice.

"Otani," she laughed, "Stop that."

I rolled my eyes, "Okay, fine. So, really, what's up?"

"Nothing really, I'm walking home from class. I might go pick up my paycheck from work though…"

I tilted back in my desk chair, "Oh, you're not working tonight?"

"No," she sounded sad, "I am working, just later…"

"Oh."

"Someone took my shift this week, so now I'm closing the diner." She whined, "It's gonna be so late!"

My chair returned to the ground with a thud, "Do you want me to come get you?" I nervously peeked at my roommate, who was napping, but I was suspicious if he really was. I lowered my voice and whispered into, "I could walk you home."

"Sure, okay," She replied, getting a little happier, "I'm off at 10:30."

"10:30?!"

"Yeah, the diner closes at 10, and then I have to clean and lock up."

I smirked, "So, can I come at 10?"

She giggled, "Yes… If you help me clean."

"Fine," I grumbled. "I'll help…"

She laughed, and it sounded like she was going to close her phone and end the call.

"Koizumi! Wait!" I raised my voice. I hear my roommate roll over.

Oops.

"One second," I hushed into the phone. I ran out of my dorm room, into the hallway.

"What?" She groaned. I could tell she was flopping around, pouting wherever she was walking.

"Could you come over here tomorrow night?" I spoke carefully, "We can go out and do something first, it's just I know my roommates will be out…" Biting my lip, I waited for her answer.

"Really?" She probably stopped walking. "Um, okay… Let's go out first."

I responded unusually quickly, "Of course!"

All I could make out on the other end of the phone was her breath. She might have hmm-ed once, "Otani?"

"Yeah?"

"You'll make sure they're not gonna be there?"

Nodding to no one, I leaned up against the door to my room, "Yeah."

"Okay," Koizumi said, her voice cheered up, "I'll see you later."

That night I picked Koizumi up from work like I said I would. We walked to her house together, then said goodnight, with a short kiss. This was the first time we saw each other all week, and the last time I saw her we only got to spend an hour or two together.

Tomorrow could not come soon enough.

I had no idea what we were going to do. And I don't mean with the 'date, going out first' part. For that, we could just go to an arcade or karaoke or something fun I saw in the meantime. The whole 'let's take things further' part was really messing me. What the hell was I supposed to do?

What were we going to do?

The anticipation was eating away at me. I knew there was no way we were going to go all the way. Not this soon.

Yes, I knew we had been dating for almost 6 months, but leave me alone!

These things take time and Koizumi isn't like a super freaky girl. She's an innocent good girl- well, actually, she's more clueless and goofy, but I bet sexually she's prim and proper.

My excitement grew as I walked back to my dorm building.

I wondered what kind of underwear Koizumi wears. But- only for a second, then I shamed myself in my head. It wouldn't matter what she was wearing or if I even got to see anything. So much has changed in a year or so, after my last girlfriend broke up with me I couldn't think about any of this stuff. Now, I was just dying to see Koizumi again.

When I reached the street where my dorm room was, I made the decision to rub one out in the single, handicapped bathroom first. I know I'm a perverted freak. Leave me alone. It was better than being all pent-up with Koizumi tomorrow. The way I was feeling that night. Trust me.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Warnings: Sexual mentions. Sexual terms.

Risa Koizumi's POV

Saturday afternoon, I started getting ready for my date with Otani. I wasn't really sure where we were going or what we were doing, but knowing Otani it'd be something fun and kinda childish and silly. I was fine with that though.

Except, looking at myself in the mirror. Wearing just jeans and a plain t-shirt, I worried that my outfit wouldn't be good enough for… tonight.

Damn it! How am I supposed to dress for this?!

Wherever we were going was bound to be casual. I would hope he'd tell me if I was supposed to dress up. But, then tonight… How do I dress for that? I can't just be in jeans if we're going to 'take things further', whatever that meant.

I stared at myself in the mirror. My eyes fading away into blobs.

I should probably figure out what I'm okay with and what I'm not. I thought in a moment of adult clarity, harking back to what Nobuko had told me about experimenting and figuring out what I liked.

Trying to make up my mind I stated to myself.

I don't want to actually have sex.

My reflection stood awkward and lanky in the mirror. I pulled at my shirt and frowned. I skimmed my hands over my flat little boobs, thinking back to how it felt when I touched them earlier this week. And I may or may not have touched them a few more times since…

I wouldn't mind if he touched my boobs.

I lifted my shirt off my body because I obviously needed to change something. In the mirror, I saw my long, straight torso staring back at me.

Maybe… I could just not take my shirt off.

Suddenly, my plain, boring, skin-colored bra didn't seem fitting for the occasion either, even if I wasn't going to show it off or anything.

To my dresser I went, digging through drawers until I came across something a little better. I mean, maybe it was better. Otani was always saying how fun I was. I laughed, shrugged, and switched my bras. I put a long sleeve shirt on instead of the tee and changed my pants from jeans to corduroy pants. Sure, I didn't look super fancy or girly, but I was content with my outfit, nodding in the mirror. It was the perfect mix of trying hard but looking casual. I dressed it up with some bracelets and stuff and slipped on a pair of flats.

Giving myself a lame thumbs up in the mirror, I figured it was about time to leave. Man, was I nervous for tonight!

But let's worry about that later.

After we went out- I had a good time, by the way, our usual fun- my nerves really came back full swing. The entire walk to Otani's dorm I tried to maintain my emotions, mostly I was trying to control my shaking since we were holding hands.

I found myself wondering if he was nervous. Or, if maybe he had done this sort of thing before, like maybe with his ex-girlfriend.

But oh my god! They would have been so young! Weren't they in middle school?!

Thinking of them only made me wig out even more.

I didn't know if I wanted him to be experienced and know what he was doing or be completely clueless like me. Which was the better option? Both seemed bad!

I forced my mind to focus on something else, anything else. I fully put all my energy into looking where I was walking. That effort might have been in vain though, because when I started walking too fast and in the wrong direction, Otani pulled my hand and said, "Koizumi, its this turn."

"Oh," I laughed it off the best I could, "Right. Oops."

"Jeez, act like you've been here before, please." He teased me, like he usually did, but for some reason what he said hurt my feelings a little. Or it at least seeped through to my heart.

Should I just act like I know what I'm doing? When we do whatever it is we're doing…?

Figuring out the ins and outs of a relationship was so hard. As if getting him someone to like you back wasn't hard enough, once you're in a relationship the challenges never stop arising. I just didn't know what to do or how to act. What was it going to be like this time in his room? Now that it was on the table we could do more than kissing.

What if I suddenly changed my mind? What if I wanted to run away and never look back? Or what if I wanted-?

No, I told myself and I glanced over at Otani, I still don't want to have sex.

Holding his hand, and following him, I reminded myself how good Otani looked. And how much I really did love him. I guess we're a pretty odd-looking couple, with me being so much taller than him (or him being shorter, but whatever), but I loved him so much. When no one else was around, it was easy to boldly declare, 'I don't care what anybody else thinks! I love him.'

I just wished tonight could be easy too.

"Koizumi!" Otani called out to me, as we reached the door to his building. He scanned his card in, letting go of my hand to grab the door.

"Hm? What?" I muttered.

He smiled holding the door open for me, "I swear to you, I asked my roommates both a dozen times if there was any chance they were gonna be here tonight."

I chuckled and tapped him on the head, "Good boy. What did they say?"

He recalled their answers, "Well, the one, you know the one with the dark hair, he said he was going back home for the weekend so he'd be gone. And the other one said he was going to go see his girlfriend, who is older and has a place of her own-" He smirked, "But I didn't really believe that so I asked again and he said he was actually going on some boring trip that his family goes on every year, but he said he could sneak away to a love hotel, so he wasn't completely lying… Isn't that so funny?" He cracked himself up, and I laughed a little. Only a little, because the mention of a love hotel sent a shockwave of fear down my spine.

Otani gathered himself and stated with confidence, "So, if either of them are there I am going to absolutely lose it."

I grinned, "Okay."

I walked through the door entering the building. Otani rushed back to me, and we went up the stairs.

The hallway to his room seemed to be going by much faster. I thought his room was pretty far down, away from the stairway, but it felt like we got there in a matter of mere seconds. I was filled with butterflies. I was sick to my stomach.

Pushing my hair back, I attempted to calm myself down. But, there was little success. I don't know why I was flipping out so much, but I couldn't help it. I felt like there was just so much pressure.

"Okay," Otani went to his door and shifted his shoulders playfully, "Ready?" He asked me, turning his head around to face me.

I watched his face fall.

Paralyzed, I stood still a few steps down the hall. My arms hung down long at my side. I don't know why, but it was like I was about to cry.

This was all just too much. I couldn't figure it out in my own head. I loved Otani so much. I wanted to do so much with him and make him happy, but I felt so out of control. Like I couldn't do anything. Frozen, with the thoughts of what-ifs and what was normal. All I wanted was to be with him, I didn't care if we were 'on-time' or 'looked weird', or if it was the most awkward thing in the world. I wanted to be with him, for real, but how do you go about asking for that?

Helpless, I couldn't do anything. Instead, I stood lifeless and dead inside. When all I really wanted was to go inside.

Otani reached out to me with his eyes, of concern and care. He reaffirmed to me, with a sincere tone of voice, "You don't have to worry, Koizumi, I mean it, I would never ever force you to anything you didn't want to do."

That was all nice what he was saying, for real it was great that he was saying stuff like that to me, but in that moment that wasn't what I needed to hear in order to cheer up.

Then I realized if I had no ability to control what we were doing when we were doing it, what we were supposed to be doing, but maybe Otani did. In some variation of words, I tried to tell him how I was feeling.

"But Otani, what would you do if I wanted to do stuff, but I didn't want to ask for it, because I was really nervous and scared about it?"

And with that, I left the rest up to him.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Thanks for follows/comments/favorites!


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Warning: Okay, big one… Sexual activity. Sexual terms used.

Atsushi Otani's POV

"You don't have to worry, Koizumi, I mean it, I would never ever force you to do anything you didn't want to do." I faced her, trying to sound as serious and meaningful as I could. I wanted to calm her down and reassure her. I really appreciated her. She was so important in my life. How could I tell her I'd never mean to hurt her? That'd she be safe with me.

"But Otani, what would you do if I wanted you to do stuff, but I didn't want to ask for it, because I was really nervous and scared about it?"

What was she saying? Was she really giving me the okay for us to do something right now? Tonight?

I know we had talked about it, but she was practically shaking the whole way here.

I went over to her. I placed my hand over hers and looked directly into her eyes, but she was avoiding me. Was she frightened or embarrassed? I couldn't tell. I never expected her to say something like that. To be honest I thought she would have gone back on the whole 'going further' thing by now.

"You serious?" I tried to read her. She was giving off all sorts of nervous hesitation. I didn't know how to proceed. I wanted to make sure if we did anything it would be okay with her. "If you really want me to, I could take the lead."

Her eyes lit up a bit, and she was suddenly looking back at me. "What?"

"And if something doesn't feel right, you just say 'stop' and I will." I laced my fingers in hers. "I'm nervous too."

Her eyes glanced into my intently. She looked so sweet and delicate all of a sudden. I could tell she was scared, even though I guess she had already told me that. Hell, I was scared too. I'd never been with a girl like this before.

She was all tensed up and grabbing my hand hard.

"Otani…" she started and I braved myself for her answer, knowing if she said no to the whole thing I'd back off, "You'll go slow?"

I nodded.

She asked another question, with her voice shaking, "And, and you won't go all the way?"

I shook my head, "No, not if you don't want to."

"I don't," she stated outright, "I'm not ready for full-on sex."

I might have laughed a little under my breath. "Sorry, I'm agreeing, it was just funny hearing you say that." She frowned a bit sarcastically.

Some of the tension faded. "Koizumi, let's just go in and kiss. I'll try to move things along- just a little bit- and if you get uncomfortable tell me to stop, okay?"

She agreed, "Okay."

She relaxed a little and smiled, but I could tell there was still a part of her that was freaking out inside.

I gripped her hand and swung my dorm room door open. I whipped my head back around to see her.

Koizumi looked so anxious, so I had to be strong for both of us. I tugged on her hand as if to pull her closer, "Come here."

She followed after me, the door shutting behind her, as I took a seat on my bed. Her bag fell to the side as she crashed down.

I leaned over to her and she moved into me, and we began kissing.

We made out for a little while, I didn't want to go too fast and scare her. But, slowly I started moving my tongue out and tracing along her bottom lip.

Instinctively, I pushed back against her body. I opened my eyes for a second, feeling her fall back some. She put one of her hands back on the bed to catch herself, and she came back up to kiss me again.

My eyes shut and I grabbed the back of her head, under her hair and near her neck. I was practically kneeling with one leg on the bed, leaning over her.

I released a little noise, but I tried to hide it. I wanted to move on. I wanted to touch her body, but I didn't know where to start. And here I was saying I'd take the lead.

Her boobs. Her legs.

I couldn't figure out which was better or really which would be worse. I couldn't touch down there just yet, she totally lose it, thinking I was trying to go all the way… but god I wanted to.

I compromised for somewhere in the middle, and moved my hand off the back of her neck and down to her side, near her hips. Pushing up on my knee, I moved in ever closer. I was practically above her.

My side was against her body. Carefully, I began to move my fingers around while we kissed. I traced her side in slow circles, almost like a massage. Her shirt folded under my hand.

Delicately, and extremely slowly, I inched my hand up her torso.

Somewhere in the middle of kissing and touching, I figured she had to realize what I was subconsciously going for. Then again, she was kinda clueless, she might have had no idea what I was trying to do. And now I just seemed like a weirdo with a thing for a girl's torso.

My hand was mere centimeters away from creeping up onto her chest. I pulled away from our kissing for a second. Both of us caught our breaths. I moved my tongue around in my mouth. I peered down at her breasts.

And now watching me, I think she realized.

I glanced back up at her, "Koizumi!" I said with intensity, a little louder than I was expecting. I looked her in the eyes and asked for permission, "Can I?"

With squinted eyes and a red face, she nodded and mumbled, "Yes."

On command, I slid my hand up onto her boob, pressing it up as I went. I concentrated on my hand rubbing over one of her breasts. My amount of focus was immense. Then, I remembered that I should probably check on her reaction.

Her eyes were shut tight, she was still tensed up and stiff. She peeked out at me for a second, probably because I had completely stopped moving altogether.

She seemed suddenly concerned, "What?" She muttered.

My eyes shifted, looking at my other hand on my knee, then back up at her- mostly her body. I meant to ask her what I said next, but it came out more like a demand, "Move back."

Instead of protesting to me, like maybe she would normally do if I told her to do something like that, especially using the kind of commanding, deep voice I did, Koizumi listened. She pushed her body back against my bed, so she was laying sideways across it, her legs dangling off, bending at the knee. Her head and shoulders were up against the wall, but now I was able to do what I wanted to.

I shifted under the pillar of the top bunk and into my bed. I put my stomach and one leg up on the mattress. My other leg hung off, occasionally hitting the side of the bed. I supported myself on my forearms just next to Koizumi's side. My head was just above her neck, tilted sideways. I touched both my hands on her body, first at her rib cage. Then, when I felt she was comfortable, I moved both my hands up onto her chest.

I squeezed them just a little.

Holy shit.

She felt so good. If I'm being totally truthful, I was the tiniest bit worried her boobs would feel like nothing. Like touching my own chest, but nah, this was totally different.

They're soft, but like totally firm.

I couldn't believe she was letting me do this. Honestly, I was freaking out. I didn't move my hands for a while. I didn't know how or what I could even do. I didn't want this to stop.

Suddenly, Koizumi spoke. When I tiled my head up to see her, she was turned sideways as if she was ashamed, like a little kid who had done something wrong. "I'm sorry," she said in a voice that sounded like she might cry soon, "I know they're really small…"

I jerked my head up, "What?!"

I took one hand off her chest and touched her cheek. She finally looked me in the eye. I spoke to her with a bit too much passion.

"They're good," I admitted to her.

"Really?" She blushed, not believing me. My other hand started to inch down her stomach.

"Yes," I reassured her with a nod. Then I looked down under me, at her body, to my other hand. I had found the end of her shirt. "Could I go underneath?"

Her eyes went wide. She didn't give me an answer straight away. She glanced to the side again, scanning the room, then nodded once, "Okay."

And with that my hand was up her shirt, going right for her boob. Over her bra still, of course, but I really didn't care I was into just all of this.

I hoped my excitement didn't show too much. Staring back up into Koizumi's eyes, I muttered her name, then gave more attention to her lips. Once again we were making out.

Softly, I could hear her moaning a little bit. Under her breath and into my mouth, somewhere in there I swore she was making noise.

Was she feeling good? That'd be so cool if she was.

I took my mouth off of hers and readjusted on the bed. I lifted my body closer to the wall so I could lean my shoulder up against it.

With both hands, the second one having made its way down the front of her shirt while we kissed, I rounded her boobs. With the palm of my hand, I made little circles. I tried my hardest not to make any sudden movements, but I was losing my mind man! How was I supposed to stay calm and be gentle when she felt this insanely good?

Abruptly, one of Koizumi's hands pushed my forehead back. She broke our kissing quite forcefully, to say the least. "Otani!"

I froze.

Petrified, I stared her in the eyes.

What did I do? Did I mess this all up? Damn it, I got too rough.

Her eyes shifted, "Uh, what am I supposed to do?" She asked, but didn't have an answer. I shrugged as a gut response. "It's too weird for me that I'm just laying here."

I thought, like, really hard. Maybe this was more challenging than studying. "Oh!" I thought of something, maybe not the best solution, "I could take my shirt off."

"Huh?" She squinted, "How would that help?"

"I dunno," I frowned a little, "You could look at me..." Her face remained unchanged, that was an unsatisfying answer, clearly. Then, my brain worked on overdrive, "Rub my back! Like a massage!"

My excitement was clear in my voice. I ripped my hands out from under her shirt. I placed them on her shoulders, getting on my knees. "Is that okay?" I asked.

She rolled her eyes, kind of unenthused, "I guess."

I pulled at the middle of my shirt and popped it off. When I came out, Koizumi's expression had changed completely. She was suddenly staring at me, her gaze lowered to my chest. Her eyes wide and her breath quiet.

I let out a little laugh, to break the tension.

She blinked and looked up at me. Focusing on me, as an actual person once again, Koizumi simply stated, "You're bigger than before."

I couldn't help, but smirk.

Damn right.

That filled my ego way too much. She had to know that.

"Come 'mere!" I jumped back over to her on the bed, wrapping myself around her. She laughed out loud.

Even though I was really getting into it and we both were getting pretty giddy, I thought to announce, "I'm gonna go on top of you."

I watched for her reaction. She was smiling, like she was laughing, "Okay."

God, she looked so cute.

She gave me a little nod as she slid her head down onto the bed, rather than up against the wall.

Loosely balancing with her shoulders, I lifted half of my body over to the other side of her. Hovering over her body, I took a second, then leaned down and kissed her.

After a second or two, she threw her arms over my neck. Her hands snuck their way onto my back.

Obviously, I took this chance to get my hands right back to where they were before.

Keeping myself upright was hard, but I rested my head on the wall above Koizumi's head and forced all my body weight onto my knees. I was straddling her, as I moved my hands down to the bottom of her shirt and underneath again.

I groaned out of nowhere, my voice coming out regardless of whether I wanted it to or not. Koizumi had been tracing my shoulder blades with her fingers. When she tapped her fingers along my back, it just felt so good.

Taking a break from making out for a second, she laughed and teased me, "Stressed out lately?"

I retorted, "Yes! I've been stressed lately, what do you think?!"

She cackled.

With a grunt, I signaled my annoyance. "Well, see how you like it, girlie!"

Forgetting about her boobs- I know, sorry, how could I?- for the moment, I slipped my hands around to her back. I pushed around between her back and the bed. Attempting to do the same thing she was doing to me, I stumbled upon something else instead.

My fingers grazed upon the clasp of her bra. I stopped all motion there. My hands holding on, but not moving anything.

Searching for an answer, but without even asking, I looked into Koizumi's eyes. She became increasingly confused, the longer I did nothing.

"What happened-?"

She took her hands off my back.

Her confusion turned into concern, as I guess I looked a little bit freaked out or maybe like I had just seen a ghost. I hadn't made any sudden movements in a while.

She fumbled one of her hands back behind herself. Her hand touched mine, then felt the elastic of her bra, eventually leading to the clasp.

I saw her face go shocked and red as she realized. I bet that's about how I looked.

It's so stupid. I wasn't even thinking about undoing and seeing her boobs when I was feeling them up for like five to ten minutes. Now, it looked like I was making an attack.

"Um…" Koizumi mumbled, blushing like crazy, "I guess I could… but…"

I held my breath.

She gave me the softest expression.

I let out, "You don't—"

"No," Koizumi broke in, "That's not it." She looked through me, "I just… do I have to take my shirt off?"

I shook my head, "No, not if you don't want to."

"No," she said, getting a little annoyed, I could tell, "I mean, thank you," she touched her hand up to my chest, letting air out, "but you gotta get off of me if I'm gonna do that."

Oh my god.

"Ooh," I picked up my farther leg to move to get off of her."

The hand behind her back squeezed mine tightly. Her eyes darted at me, "Wait!"

I paused.

I watched as she put her other hand back onto mine. She took my hands and told me, "Hold on to each side."

Listening, I wrapped my fingers around the band of her bra, on each side of the clasp. Guiding my hands together, she made me unlatch her bra. Then dropped her hands from mine.

Frozen, and impressed, I muttered under my breath, "Wow."

Koizumi pushed my shoulder, "Get off of me."

When did my girlfriend get so hot?

I laughed and moved off of her. She sat up on the bed once she was free. Sitting back, I teased her, "How polite you are..."

She glared back, "Shut up."

Something about our banter was a little off though, I could feel it. Koizumi started getting worked up again. She was shaking when she brought her hands down to the end of her shirt. Her eyes kept far from mine, locked hard on the bed cover.

Her legs crossed and her hands gripping the bottom of her shirt, Koizumi stalled for what felt like forever. But, maybe it was only a few milliseconds, I don't know.

"Could you-" She started saying something, then changed her mind, "Nevermind, you can look."

Dramatically, she tore her shirt off, like it was the same as ripping off a band-aid.

What a dork.

But. Now, there she was, exposing herself to me. Letting me look at her body.

Her bra, with speckles of blue and green, fell forward. The straps slid down her arms.

I could see them. Her bare boobs coming out from underneath.

"Koizumi," I felt the need to say something. I had to tell someone about this moment in my life.

She couldn't look at me though. Her face was totally turned to the other side of the room, even though her body was facing me.

I reached forward and wrapped her into a hug. I pushed her head past mine and held her tight. My head rested by her neck. Our chests pressed up together, "Thank you."

When her voice broke, it sounded like it does when she's crying, little and pathetic, "huh?"

I shut my eyes and squeezed her tight. Her bra fell onto my lap. I spoke to her trying to express how much I loved her, "I know this isn't easy for you, as brave as you're trying to be, so thanks."

She let out a little chuckle, "You're so stupid."

Her arms folded around me. I felt a drop of water fall from her face against my shoulder.

I was happy at this moment, we didn't need to do anything more. I felt so proud to have such an awesome girlfriend like her. She's such a loser, but I'd hug her until we died.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Thanks for Kudos and comments! This story is continuing btw <3


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Warning: Sexual activity, sexual terms. 

Risa Koizumi POV

Yup, of course, I started crying. Not like full-water works sobbing, but I was getting all teary-eyed. Right in the middle of my first real sexual experience. He didn’t have to be so nice about everything. God, I hated how crazy I was about him. 

Otani had gone out of his way, constantly, trying to make me feel more comfortable about everything. And now he was thanking me. I had to cry, I mean really, what else was there to do? He was just being way too sweet. 

I held tightly to him for a while, before I slowly started to realize… my bare chest was touching his. My boobs were touching him. I mean, my nipples were practically pushed in right below his collarbone. 

Feeling awkward all over again, but still pretty darn emotional, happy, and sad, I took my body off of his. I broke away from our hug, looked down at my chest, and saw my bra was totally gone. 

Searching around the bed for it, I finally found that my bra was across Otani’s legs! 

Ah! 

I ripped my hand down to swipe my bra back, but as I did, I felt it. 

My fingers grazed upon it. 

Stuck still, I held my bra loosely with my fingers out, shocked at what they just touched. Eyes open wide, I looked at Otani, stunned. He was giving me a similar look back. Except his look was filled with more embarrassment, whereas I was more terrified. 

“Um…” He fumbled out. 

My eyes drifted back down to his crotch, despite my best efforts to stay away. Curiosity got the best of me. “Otani,” I tilted my head at his pants, trying to figure it out, “Are you… excited?” 

Peeking up at him, since I had motioned way closer to his lower half than I thought, his face was coated with blushes, “Koizumi!” He shouted, in objection. 

I sat back up, “What?” 

“You can’t just ask that…” his eyes shifted, nervously. I blinked at him, and he replied with shame, “...but yeah, I am I guess.” 

“Oh,” I nodded slightly, like he had told me something totally normal, like it was gonna rain later. 

He picked at his fingers, “I wouldn’t have said it that way though.” 

Seriously, I took his hands, “How am I supposed to say it?” I asked, taking this opportunity to get some guidance. Nobuko’s advice could only get me so far. 

Otani squinted, probably doubting me, “For real?” I held strong and he gave me a suggestion, “Well, you could say it’s hard.” 

“Hard?” I bulked, confused. 

“Yeah,” he shrugged his shoulders, “That's what people say… like I’d call your boobs soft and you’d call-“ 

“My boobs are soft?!” I glanced down at my chest, and crept my hands close to touching them, before stopping myself. Not wanting Otani to watch me. 

“...yes?” He looked at me equally confused. We both seemed to be at a loss with all this stuff, maybe he had never done anything like this before. 

I knelt forward, my hands resting on the bed by his knees. My head tilted to him, “Can I feel it?” 

His eyes went big. Silently, he nodded rapidly and repeatedly. “Mmhmm,” he mustered out. So, over his pants, I lowered one of my hands down to his penis. Or at least the bulge that I was assuming was his penis. 

There I was touching the top of it with my palm. 

Hm. 

I said what I was thinking out loud, “I guess it is hard.” I chuckled a little bit, “I don’t know if that’s the word I would use though…” 

Otani brushed his hand over the top of my head, lightly passing through my hair. “Oh shut it.” 

I laughed obnoxiously. 

My hand just held on him. 

“Hey, Koizumi?” He began, and I matched his gaze, “You can see it, if you want.” 

“Oh.” I thought for a second, then took my hand back, “Okay.” 

Otani got up from the bed. Standing in the middle of the room, facing me, he started to unzip his pants. 

I turned on the bed so I was facing out to the room again. We had moved around quite a bit. 

As he opened up the fly of his pants, revealing his underwear, I became increasingly aware of the fact I was still sitting there with just my pants on. I felt too naked without my shirt. 

I reached out for it, in a crumpled heap on the bed. Otani caught my eye, so I said, “I’m putting my shirt back on, it feels too weird with it off.” 

Otani gave a small nod, his hands holding steady at the waistband of his pants. His head peered up to me, “I should keep going, right?”

“Yeah, yeah,” I crossed one of my legs over the other as I pulled my shirt down, “Go for it.” 

He let out a “Heh” type of laughter and continued. His pants moved down from his hips to his legs. One leg at a time, he slid out, till he was just in his underwear. A pair of dark gray boxers, where I could see a bulge in the middle. 

What’s gonna happen? 

Before I was freaking out, but now I felt strangely calm. Like if someone had told me I’d be, for the most part, calmly waiting to see a boy naked for the first time as he took his pants off, I’d call you a liar. I exclaim that I for sure would find any boy doing that a crazy pervert. 

His thumbs dipped into the elastic waist of his boxers. He chuckled, “I hope it’s alright, it’s the only one I got.” 

Absentmindedly, not even thinking of the implications, I stated, “Well, it’s not like I’ve got anything to compare it to.” 

He stared up at me, “Huh?” 

“Oh,” I felt myself getting hot, “It’s just I’ve never really seen one before. I guess I’ve seen them in health books and like I have a brother but that was only when we were kids so—“

He cut me off, “It’s okay. Your boobs were the first ones I’ve seen…” He mocked me, “...except for my moms and maybe my sister’s, I guess, but ew.” 

I groaned and asked, “Well then, when you show it to me can you tell me what to do?” 

He grumbled, “Wow, that would have been helpful for me, but okay…” His face lit up, he smirked, looking up at me through his eyelids, “You’re gonna touch it?” 

I looked away, “Um yeah, I guess I could try.” 

He laughed, “Then, I’ll help you, for sure.” 

And with that, his underwear was coming down. He pulled and out of the middle popped his penis. I was a little scared to look at first, but I turned my head and peeked out of the corner of my eye. 

Then, I saw it. 

“Oh,” I sighed with relief, “It’s not that bad!” 

“Gee, thanks Koizumi,” he fussed. 

Leaning forward, almost off the bed, I reached my hand out, “So, should I touch it?” I asked, but it was pretty apparent I was going for it anyway. 

“Yeah.” 

Otani stepped closer. My hand touched him, his penis connecting with my palm, and my fingers falling around it. My brain was searching for something to do. I didn’t want to close my hand together and squeeze it too hard. I got stuck just holding it, weakly.

“Koizumi,” Otani whined, “Can you say something?” 

Turning my head up to him, I reminded him, “I... I don’t know what to do.” 

“Well, you could react to seeing it for the first time a little,” he grumbled under his breath. 

“Oh,” I perked up, “Like tell you what I’m thinking?”

His eyes rolled. “Yeah, you don’t have to say it's amazing or anything, but jeez when a guy shows his dick to you he’s laying a lot out on the line.” 

“Well, hey, that’s not fair!” I retorted, “You didn’t say my boobs were soft until later, in passing.” My hand still rested on the top of his penis as we argued, “I bared myself to you and all you said was derrrrr…” I mocked his face brainlessly looking at my boobs. 

“I did not do that!” 

“Yeah, you did, you were like, uhhhh…” After I teased him again, I admitted something, “I had to ask you if they were all right because I was worried you thought they were too small. And that you didn’t find me attract-”

Otani cut me off by placing his hand on my shoulder. He shook his head, “That’s not what I think. I like them, honest.” My heart beated. It was just so difficult for me to believe Otani really found me sexually appealing. Like I had no sexiness about me. His face fell and he spoke slowly, like he was shy, “That’s how it is for me too, don’t you understand?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“I’m worried too, that you might think-”

My voice broke in, interrupting him, loudly, “But, it’s not small!”

His head flicked up.

He reacted shocked and offended, after his anxious expression faded away, “Well, obviously I’m small Koizumi, but just not everywhere!”

So stupid. 

This boy was so funny, I swear. Maybe, somewhere deep down I was thinking about what he would look like… naked. But, honestly, I did not really care about his size. I loved Otani too much for who he was to care about something trivial like that. At least, it felt trivial to me. Maybe other people don’t feel that way… It could be that I was an outlier, I already liked a guy way shorter than me. I had decided a long time ago: I like who I like, so what?

Coming out of my laughter, I told him somewhere between joking and serious, “No, no, I was kinda worried it’d be weird and scary looking.” I waved my hand in front of my face, “So when I said it’s not that bad, that’s what I meant.” 

“Oh,” he paused, and looked down at my hand, which was still lightly holding on to him, “Can you move your hand?” 

I stared blankly at him. “How?” Mostly, I was asking, because I was too afraid to do the wrong thing. 

His eyelids shut a little, “Just back and forth, whatever you’re okay with.” 

With caution, I began to try. My hand cupped around his penis and moved down its length. I witnessed Otani’s reaction. He shut his eyes. 

“Move back up,” he instructed, and I attempted to follow, sliding my hand back to the top. 

“Like this?”

“Yeah, could you keep—“ I pushed my hand back down, closing my fingers together just a bit more. His head tilted back, “Eh,” he moaned. 

“Are you okay?!” I questioned, crazy worried. 

I think his eyes opened, looking right at the ceiling, “Yes yes,” he said quickly, “Do that again.” 

“Do what?”

His head came back down. He looked me in the eyes, with a soft expression, “You can squeeze it. It feels good, trust me, you’re not gonna break it.” 

I licked my lip, and accepted, “Okay.” 

Resuming, I cupped the width of his dick and slid my hand down, squeezing my fist together more, but not full pressure. I moved my hand up and down a couple of times. 

Otani’s eyes were closed and his head jerked around here and there. After a few times, he groaned. 

His face returned down to me, his eyes slowly opened, “Koizumi…” he huffed out, his voice husky and his breath panting, “...It’s gonna come out.” 

“Huh?” I jumped, stopping my hand. 

He brought his hand down to mine, “You can move out of the way if you want.” His hand took control of mine. He guided me down his penis again. 

“What’s gonna—?” 

I was getting scared. I think something like this had been mentioned in health class, but I thought that was only for making babies. 

He pushed in on me. Our hands made their way back up. When we were almost at the top, his voice broke, “Koizumi! Move!” 

I ducked to the side, getting my head out of the way. A stream of white, solid liquid came out of his penis. It shot towards the bed, but landed on my lap, well, more on my pants near the knee. 

Otani let out a heavy gasp. When he came to, he caught a glimpse of the stain on my pants, “Oh, I’m sorry!” 

I brought my head back upright again and saw my pants, they weren’t completely ruined or anything. I wasn’t even mad about it. I was just so shook up about what happened. And it was weird to see this white goo on me. 

He rambled, “Do you want me to get a towel? I could wet it and it’d probably come out. Sorry! Gosh, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. This is too much, it’s crazy—“ 

Without thinking, I reached a finger out and poked at it. 

“AH!” Otani screamed, “Koizumi! Don’t touch it!” 

With liquid from his body on my finger, I looked up at Otani, standing before me. I baffled, “What?” I touched my pointer finger to my thumb and squashed it between them. My eyes locked on it curiously. “Wow, that came out of you?” 

He covered his face with his arm, hiding his eyes in his elbow, “Good god.” I saw his penis, flopping down, totally different than before. He chuckled, “You’re something else.” 

Otani bent down and reached for his underwear and pants. At eye level, both near the floor, he gently asked me, “Can I touch you?” 

I shook my head, instantly terrified and immediately rejecting, “No.” 

He reacted surprised, if not confused. And I felt forced to justify myself, even though he didn’t ask, “I don’t want to!” 

He nodded twice, “Okay. I won’t.” He stood back up, taking his bottoms up with him. “If you don’t want to, I really won’t. I just feel like kinda an asshole boyfriend, getting off and then not doing anything for you.” 

I watched him as he zipped on his pants and searched around the room. Turned away from me he said, “So, thanks,” then he let our eyes meet, “For everything we did.” 

His eyes kept on me, so I got out, “Yeah… No problem.” 

He snickered under his breath, then peaked past me. He mentioned, pushed his hand through his hair, “Hey, what time did your family say you had to be back?” 

“Uh… I think 11, no maybe it was 10.” 

“Oh,” he frowned, bummed, and pointed behind me at the digital alarm clock that was probably one of his roommates’, “It’s 9:35.”

I bet I looked pretty bummed out too. I wanted to spend more time with Otani. I feel like I never got to see him. And this had been such a good day together, as awkward and touch-and-go as it had been, I didn’t want it to end. 

He threw out a line, “You couldn’t stay longer?” 

I took it, “Um. Maybe. I’d have to come up with a good reason first. Like the train is running late or something.” 

“Hmm,” he thought, “You don’t have to lie to your family… but…” 

I took out my phone, “I’ll just say I can’t remember if I was supposed to be back at 10 or 11, and if it was 10 I don’t think I’ll make the train.” I flipped my phone open. 

Otani listened while I was on the phone with my mom, who picked up. I explained to her I couldn’t remember the time but assured her I was fine and would be home. Maybe she was a little suspicious, but she did not seem that mad. 

When I shut my phone and turned around, Otani was back over by the bed. He had put his shirt back on. 

I spun myself around on the floor and he sat down. My phone went back in my pocket, and I smiled at him. 

He held his arms out to me. “Come here.” 

I jumped up to him and joined him on the bed. We wrapped our arms around each other. 

Kinda embarrassingly, I cried out how much I loved him, saying things like, “I missed you so much!” And “I just want to spend every second with you!” 

He laughed quietly and rubbed my back. And out of nowhere, he stated, “Koizumi, you’re a good girlfriend.” His head crashed down lightly between my neck and shoulder. 

Yay! 

Hearing him say that made me really happy. I leaned out, away from him, gripping on to his upper arms, “Thanks!” I grinned, beside myself, he bent forward and kissed me quickly. And when we came apart, I proclaimed, “I love you!”

We ended our night by cuddling together, holding each other close, and talking about almost nothing. I remember mixing his hair around with my fingers as his head laid on my shoulder. He told me about school, how his classes had been, what he was learning. I mostly complained about my school, so I guess that’s where he’s changed and I haven’t. 

But, eventually, the time came for me to leave. So, Otani walked me to the train station and we parted ways. Not without sharing a kiss goodnight though, and him telling me to “Be safe!” 

Also, I might have had to text him when I got home okay, but he wouldn’t like me telling anyone that. So, that’s all alleged.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Hey! Thanks for reading everybody! This chapter is a little lighter than the previous, so sorry if it feels a little slow. 

Chapter Warnings: Porn and sexual Mentions, sexual terms. 

Atsushi Otani POV

What a night. I thought when I got back into my now empty dorm room. The door shut behind me and I pressed my back up against it. 

Koizumi was just here. I looked at my bed. I could see the bumps and dips in the bed from where we were just were. So, much had happened, even though maybe on paper or if I told some of the guys I know from school it wouldn’t sound like a lot. In my mind, I was really glad that we did as much as we did. 

My eyes shut and I caught a glimpse. It was like every time I blinked I saw her again. Sitting across from me without a shirt on. On the ground, holding my… 

I blushed and grabbed my cheeks. My face was heating up. 

Oh my god. 

Yeah, we definitely did a lot. More than I was expecting. I hope Koizumi was okay with everything that happened. At some points, she seemed hesitant but kept going. And then… at other times… She seemed really into it. 

Like what she said right before we started. Her words kept replaying in my head. 

“What would you do if I wanted you to do stuff, but I didn’t want to ask for it?” 

She was shaking when she said that. It was so hard to tell if she was nervous or anxious. Like there was really a difference. How was I supposed to proceed? 

I did all I could. God, I did more than I could. I’m clueless. I really am as dense as everyone says. Holy shit. There she was right in my room, half-naked and asking me what she should do, and I totally stalled. 

I don’t know Koizumi?! I don’t care. Do anything you want! 

Truly, we could have just kissed and cuddled all night and I’d still want to be with her. 

God, I wish I could be around her all the time. I relayed to myself as I paced around my room, before flopping onto my bed. I stared up at the bars of the bunk above me. 

There was a part of me that wanted to keep going. I can’t lie. 

I wanted more nights like that with her. 

Finding another time like that was going to be impossible, but I had enough intelligence to figure out that I had to be the one to plan stuff like this. It was only fair. I mean, if she was going to let me do these kinds of things with her, when she’s so scared, it's the least I could do. 

I just wish we weren’t so busy. And I wish I didn’t have roommates to deal with. Like if Koizumi and I could just be together always that would work out a little better. 

I pictured that for a second. She and I, spending every second of every day together, and I started cracking up, alone in my room. 

Okay, maybe not every second. We’d rip each other to shreds. 

Still, I’d kill for just an entire night together, instead of a few little hours. During the week is basically out of the question. Besides our school work and part-time jobs, while I wouldn’t say it’s impossibly far, my university isn’t very close to Koizumi in our hometown. It would be hard for her to travel here mid-week. And where else are we supposed to go? Her house? My house? No way, our parents are there! 

If I had a whole night with her, what would I even do? 

Like I’ve said, I had no clue what I was doing. That’s not totally fair. I obviously had some idea about sex, not just from health class, but from my own research as well over the years. Still though, in the moment, I felt very unrehearsed. 

It’s a lot different when a real girl is in front of you. 

I could pretend I had a big game in the comfort of my room, but with Koizumi, it was hard to be calm and collected. When she would ask me questions, suddenly I had no answers. Like I had never even heard of sex in my life. 

Her asking me to take the lead… Man, I was not prepared for that at all. I mean, I really liked that she had that kind of trust in me. And I loved that she was outspoken enough to tell me, in so many words, that she wanted us to do sexual things together. However, it would probably be useful if, before the next time, I did a little studying. 

I was kind of tapped out for the night though, so I went to bed. Plain and simple. What did you think I did? 

Risa Koizumi POV

Sunday morning, more like the afternoon because I slept in so late, I called up Nobuko to tell her everything. Well, I wasn’t going to outright tell her everything, but I’d hint at as much as I could. 

I had come home from Otani’s and went right to bed, but I found it increasingly hard to sleep. Moments kept replaying in my head, not allowing my heart to settle down. Our night together had really stressed me out, but it also really filled me with warmth. Getting to do those kinds of things with Otani made me so happy! 

“What?!” Nobuko shouted through the phone. I had to call her like this since she was with her grandma. 

“What…?” I whimpered. 

“No offense Risa, I’m proud of you and all for going for it, but that’s all you guys did?!” 

“I didn’t even tell you what we did…” my voice grumbled as I pouted.

She took a motherly tone, “Listen, it’s alright. I guess it can’t all be done in one go. It was a good start, but you can’t keep holding back!” Suddenly she sounded more like my coach. 

“What do you mean?” 

She sighed, “Well, you shouldn’t be so wishy-washy. I mean you tell him you want to have sex, but you don’t want to ask for it?!”

I screamed, “That is not what I said!”

“It basically was.” 

“But, Nobu, it wasn’t, ok?” I questioned her. 

She understood, “Okay, I’m sorry. You need to go at your own pace, you’re right. I’m just worried you’re confusing him.” 

I breathed out, “Yeah… I probably am… but…” I thought, rolling the phone to my other side, “I’m really confused.” 

Falling silent all of a sudden, I couldn’t tell if Nobuko was coming up with a response, plotting an evil plan, or dead. 

“Nobu?” I peeped. 

“Hm,” she moaned out. “Yeah,” she said to herself like she was nodding along with her own idea. I heard a snap, “Okay, Risa. I got an idea, you don’t have to take it though- I don’t want you getting upset with me-“

I got scared, “Okay…” 

She spoke simply, “You could always look at porn.” 

I gasped, horrified, “WHAT?!” 

“So you feel more familiar with the stuff you’re doing with Otani.” 

“B...b…” I was a lost soul, “Nobu you were the one who was-“ 

“Yes! I know I was mad at darling about porn, I understand! This is different.” She groaned, “And besides, I am over that now. It’s important you feel like you know what you’re doing when the time comes, but like I said Risa you don’t have to…” 

“Maybe,” I whispered.

“Okay,” she said cheery, “And Risa there’s one more thing I got to tell you about!” 

After we finished chatting, I shut my phone down, disappointed with myself.

Maybe??

What the hell was I talking about? I didn’t want to look at porn. That was for perverts! And it’s gross! Where would I even find porn anyway? 

Well… I do have a brother. 

But stop it sickos! I wasn’t going to do anything to myself that night. Not after I just got off the phone with Nobuko and I was still living off the high of the night before. I mean, sure, that probably would have actually been a good time to have some… alone time, but I really freaked myself out with that kind of stuff. 

However, come Tuesday, later in the week, when I didn’t have a shift at work after school and my parents were still out, I started to think about trying something. Maybe, since my brother was at his job, I would try messing around a little. I mean, I had the whole house to myself…

Still, I ran to my room, slammed the door shut, and locked it. I pulled all the shades down and hid under my covers. I thought about searching my brother’s room for something to look at like Nobuko said. I could use those pictures of sexy girls as reference for how I should try to act… But, Agh! The thought of looking at what my brother looks at when he- EW! I could not do it! 

Instead, curled up under my covers, I tried to imagine what it might be like. I bet all those girls in those kinds of magazines have really great figures. They probably have huge boobs and lots of curves. Those girls probably look like actual girls unlike me, with my flat chest and straight, rectangle body. 

That’s when I remembered to stop being so hard on myself. I thought about my friend from high school, Seiko. I know she would tell me to get over myself, in the sweetest way. She’d tell me that I was a real girl, unlike her- even though I really didn’t see it that way. 

I remembered in high school when all those girls at basketball made fun of me for being taller than Otani. They said, “No way he’s dating someone taller than him, we should’ve known!” It hurt my feelings a lot then and I barely even liked him at the time. 

And then when those same girls said it to Seiko, “No way he’s dating someone who is really a boy, hahaha!” I just got really mad. Who were they to say who he could and couldn’t date? Who were they to tease Seiko like that? And that’s when we became good friends. 

For a moment in my room, I wondered how hard it might be for Seiko to deal with this kind of stuff… But then again, she probably faced it head-on, unlike me who was a scared little girl about everything slightly adult. 

I chuckled to myself, getting over it. 

I shut my eyes. I tried to recall the memories of a few nights ago, with Otani, alone in his dorm room. Suddenly, I had a new approach. I wasn’t going to touch myself with no context like before. My hand slid under my shirt. I wanted to imagine he was touching me again. 

He was so gentle, but it felt really good. I mean, I was so freaking nervous when it was happening, but he was grabbing me violently or hurting me at all. His hands basically just hovered there on top of me. The anticipation of what might happen after really got me going in the moment. 

I squeezed my hand a bit. Kinda like I ended up touching him. 

A smile broke out on my face and I let my breath go. 

That was crazy. 

I still couldn’t believe that I had done that. I mean, I saw Otani basically naked. And then I touched him?! 

My hand rubbed over my breast a little faster. I brought my other hand down, underneath my bedsheets. It laid softly on my stomach.

I heard Otani’s voice playing over again in my head, “Do that again…” “Koizumi…” “...It’s gonna come out.” My fingers focused on the center of my boob. I mashed them around, starting to feel an overwhelming sense of pleasure. I saw Otani in my mind. His head tilted back, an expression of frustration, then release on his face. I couldn’t believe what had happened.

God, I want to make him feel like that again. 

It was too good getting to do these sorts of things with him. I loved him so much, all I could ever think about now was him. I’d be in school, learning about kinds of fabric, and I’d think about how well I wanted him to do on his exams. I’d be at work, waiting tables, and my brain would have me picturing us out on dates together. And now, even alone in my room, my thoughts were consumed thinking about how I could make him feel even better next time. 

Next time… 

A sigh snuck out of my mouth, in a huffed, out of breath sort of way. 

What would we do next time?

I began to spiral. 

I asked myself questions like: Would we have to go farther next time? What was left to do? 

I felt the hand on my stomach pause at my belly button. It was stuck. I couldn’t move it, even if I really wanted to. There was too much fear. To bring my hand down felt impossible. 

Which sucked, because it basically ruined my whole alone time experience. And there I was feeling really good from touching my boob. But, now I was scared again. I was worried Otani would want to go farther… Meaning… 

AH! I’m not ready for that at all!

The thought of it made me panic. I huddled myself up into a ball on my bed, blushing ann hot. Taking deep breaths, I tried to calm myself down, but it wasn’t really working. 

Great, Risa, now you’re gonna be all nervous next time, again! 

I groaned, letting my legs go. 

I heard my phone sound from my dresser across the room. It wasn’t just a text, someone was calling. 

Tired, physically, and emotionally, I got up and power walked to the dresser. I flipped my phone open without looking, “Hello?”

“Hey,” It was Otani. 

How embarrassing! I can’t let him hear me right after I just did what I did. 

“Uh…” I stuttered, “Hi, what’s up?”

He sighed, “Bad news,” My eyes went wide, “We can’t hang out this weekend. My roommates are both going to be here. They have exams this week they need to study for, so they aren’t leaving.”

I gasped, “What? So we can’t even go out because they need to study?!”

He groaned, probably rolling his eyes at me, “No, you idiot! I mean we can’t... hang out…” His voice suggested explicit activity. 

“Oohh,” I responded. 

“I’m sorry,” He mumbled. 

I made my voice cheery, “It’s okay! We’ll find another time, no worries.”

“Okay…” He paused, and it's almost like I could hear his brain attempting to think about how to say this next part, “You do want to… another time? Right?”

I hesitated. My heart was beating fast, it was such a hard question to answer at this very moment. If he asked me before I got home it would have been a definite yes. 

He continued, going first, “Because I do.” 

I tried to spit out an answer, “I think so.” 

He balked, “You think so?!” His voice got teasingly mad, “What the hell does that mean? I swear Koizumi, you make no sense!” 

I yelled back, “Well, sorry! I don’t know how to answer stuff like that!”

He calmed down, “Okay. Can you figure it out before next time, whenever that is?” I heard his voice get serious, “Because I’d like to pay you back.”

Huh? What does that mean? And I’m the one who makes no sense… God!

“Um. Okay,” I replied softly and he hung up the phone quickly. 

A/N: Thanks for reading! I have the next few chapters ready, but I am trying to keep writing ahead of when I post. So the next one should be out in a few days. Thanks again!


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter warnings: Sexual language, masturbation/porn, the topic of consent (non-rape, don't worry)

Atsushi Otani POV:

This entire week I have been thinking over that night with Koizumi. Okay, maybe not the entire week, I have been pretty focused on classes once I am in them and when I'm studying, but when I hit my pillow each night it's like, Surprise! Koizumi time!

At first, like that night and Sunday night, it was a good feeling. I was thinking about how awesome it was that we even did what we did. Seriously, I got to touch her under her shirt, she let me see her boobs, and then she even touched my dick! Dude, it was so cool!

But then, later in the week, like on the weekdays after the longest days of class and work ever, I started to feel kinda bad. Curse my conscience!

I felt guilty, not because I knew Koizumi didn't want me to go any further with her… but, well… She was actually very against it at the end there, before we cuddled in my bed. There's yet another problem, whenever I lay down in my bed I start thinking about her again!

Anyway, my guilty conscience was due to the simple fact that I came and she didn't.

I felt so bad! I mean, if I told anyone they be like, "You're a dick, you treat your girlfriend like that?!" I guess it's possible some dudes would high five me and be like, "Hell yeah bro, that's the way to do it!" But, those guys are douches! I didn't want to treat Koizumi like that at all.

I do not see her as some object to get me off. I really do love her and respect her- I know it's hard for me to tell her that, but I wasn't expecting it to be hard to show her. But if she doesn't want me to touch her, what am I supposed to do?

I suppose I could try to make her feel better when I was just touching her boobs. God, how hard was that going to be though? And when was it even going to happen? Would there ever be another time for us to… hang out like that?

I was going to have to do some research before the next time. But going into an adult store was going to be so embarrassing. I bet I'd be called a little boy for sure. And everybody around would see me as some perverted freak.

Great.

The more I thought about it the worse I felt because then I started wishing and hoping Koizumi would just let me touch her. I prayed she would let me try to make her feel good. Then I saw an image of myself like a monster, forcing her to do stuff she wasn't comfortable with. Making her upset. So, I shoved that right out of my mind! I would never do that to her. I would make sure she was comfortable before doing anything else. 

I wondered what she would be comfortable with though. 

She did say, "What would you do if I wanted you to do stuff, but I didn't want to ask for it?" And she told me to "take the lead", but then she told me "no," and "I don't want to!" That seemed pretty crystal clear to me.

Koizumi has her line. I understood that. I got that. I guess though…There was no harm in thinking about what it would be like if I ever did get to feel her… down there…

Even if that day wasn't going to come anytime soon. I'm sorry, but I was gonna start to hope on my own. I made a note to myself to keep myself in check around her. I wouldn't push her too much. 

On Tuesday night, I had to call off any weekend plans with Koizumi. We were still going to go out on a date or something of course. I still wanted to see her. Maybe it'd be nice to hang out without the pressure of hanging out like there was last time. I still really liked to spend time with her. 

After our call ended, my mood was kind of soured. I laid on my bed, kinda bummed, and starting to have those guilty feelings. The ones about not being able to make Koizumi feel as good as she made me feel.

My roommates were out, but I don't know for how long. I was pretty sure one of them was in class, but I had no idea where the other was. Maybe he was with friends or he went out to dinner. But he could have come back any minute.

Suspiciously looking over at the door, I slipped my legs under my covers. And I brought my hand down there too.

I stared blankly and vaguely at the bottom of the top buck above my head. I replayed the best memories from that night.

Koizumi's hands-on mine, behind her back. Her moving me to take her bra off. Then, telling me off, reminding me I had to get off of her if I wanted to see her without a shirt on.

A big grin appeared on my face, laying on my bed. I kept my senses aware, listening for any movement at the door. If one of my roommates came in I would jump up and act normal. That was the plan.

So, with that in mind, I cupped my hand around my penis under the covers. I moved slowly up and down. I remembered how it felt when she was holding me.

God, I was embarrassed, but I was also so fucking excited. If Koizumi was going to do that again I would be willing to wait a while.

My hand moved faster.

She was such a great girlfriend. I knew this stuff scared her. I knew she was kind of a baby when it came to sexual things. Hell, I was a little nervous too. But she was still trying really hard.

We didn't have to go farther if she didn't want to. I'd love to touch her down there and see what she looks like. I didn't have any experience, but I would like to learn with her. Thinking about how I would start, I figured my fingers could just wiggle around until she told me otherwise.

My breath panted out. I could feel myself getting hot, imaging that. Bending my knees in, I turned my body towards the door and watched with lowered eyes.

I saw an image of myself standing in the center of the room, Koizumi on the bed below me. I was feeling it. I knew what was coming, I mean I had of course jerked off before, but I never had someone else do it for me before. I never had to cum while a girl I liked was watching.

I told her, "Koizumi… It's gonna come out."

And she said, "Huh?"

Did she really not know what I was talking about?'

I let her know, "You can move out of the way if you want.

But what would have happened if she didn't?

I could tell she didn't really understand when her face turned worried and she panicked, "What's gonna-"

I was already there. My hand was on hers and we were reaching the top of my penis. I felt so incredibly good. I had to release.

"Koizumi move!"

In my bed, I felt it too. Not the same way, of course. She wasn't even here. But just trying to come to terms with the fact she did that for me, makes me overworked. I start feeling sweaty.

And then, Koizumi- that freak! Poked at it. She literally pinched my cum between her fingers, could she not?! Holy shit.

It was probably the most unattractive thing in the moment, that's the most enticing looking back.

Why did she want to touch it?

That felt like the only question I could ask myself. I valued Koizumi's consent so much, I wasn't going to do anything she did want to. So why was I holding onto the little glimpse of hope? That thought that maybe she was curious about trying new things with me made me so excited.

After a few days, I concluded that she was probably curious about my body. The girl was crazy about me and boy did I know it. Haha. But, she probably was not super jazzed about me seeing her the same way I was. Ugh, if only I could make Koizumi feel more comfortable in that way. I knew that would be very hard though, especially when we had like no time alone together.

I rolled my eyes, dropping my hand, and sitting up. I was probably going to be jerking off a couple more times these next few weeks until we were able to meet up like that again. I couldn't help it. Now, I had something to reference from real life.

A few nights later I called her up again.

Why was this girl always on my mind?

I had had a great day on my own. One of my classes got canceled. I went to lunch with a few guys I met in the basketball training meeting. I handed in my assignments for the weekend, and then I went for a jog. I was chilling.

(A/N: if his college friends are explained in the manga I haven't gotten there yet so I'm making stuff up)

It's like I could have the best day ever, but it just isn't the same without Koizumi anymore. I want to tell her everything that happens to me. And when she tells me about her classes or her work, I really want to hear it. God, what losers we were!

So, come nighttime, I was laying in my bed. A roommate above me with headphones in, and the other at his desk, playing on his computer. Such hard workers, we were, huh?

Now, if only they'd leave for the weekend.

I knew that wasn't an option since they just left last weekend, but I could still wish and curse in my mind.

My head on my pillow, but with my body above the covers, I flipped open my phone. Then, I flipped it closed and opened a couple more times.

Finally, I selected her contact and called her.

She answered after the first few rings, "Hi!" She sounded happy, I guessed.

"Hey…" I spoke quietly, so my roommates wouldn't listen.

"What's up?" She asked.

"You're not at work are you?" I asked.

She answered quick, "Actually I am! But you're in luck. You actually caught me on my break."

I let a "Heh" sort of laugh out.

"So why'd ya call? Psychic," she teased me.

"Psychic?" I questioned. My ankles crossed.

"Yeah you're psychic cause you knew when I could talk," she laughed.

"Oh…" I trailed off, not really sure why I called at all, "No reason. I just wanted to talk."

"Oh okay!" She cheered, "My break is almost over, but guess what?"

I rolled my eyes and stuck my arm under my head, "What?"

"I haven't gotten yelled at today!" She clapped, then suddenly quieted down. Her manager probably heard her.

I chuckled, "Well, it's still early."

"Hey!" She objected.

I laughed to myself, getting a big smile on my face, completely out of my control, "Sorry. Sorry."

"Anyway—" Koizumi tried to break my laughter, "I might kind of have some good news. What are we doing this weekend?" She asked, but I had no answer.

"Um… I dunno," I got curious and excited, "What's the news?"

"I'll save it for when I see you…" she cackled to herself, in a totally un-sexy way. Not like a cute, flirty girl. "Could you come here this weekend?"

I shrugged, "I guess so. Don't want to take the train?"

"Yeah…" she groaned, "I have this thing Sunday morning, my teacher asked me to help with a shoot and fashion walk, and it's kinda early in the morning."

"Whoa wait— really?!" I sat up.

"Yup, I guess she liked my…" her voice left.

"Huh? Koizumi? Was that your good news?" I called out for her since the line didn't hang up.

"What? No," she whispered into the phone, "I mean it's good news, but not about us— I've got to go. Bye, love you!" She clipped her phone and hung up.

When I shut my phone and looked out into my dorm room, the roommate at the desk was staring right at me. He was paying no attention to his game.

The roommate above me playfully asked as he kicked his legs out, "Was that your girlfriend~?"

I rolled over, "Leave me alone."

"Did she hang up on you?" The one at his desk asked.

"She's at work," I responded a little offended and a little like he was stupid.

"Oh," he said.

The roommate on the bunk above me jumped down. He turned to the other roommate, then to me. "Hey, we've been meaning to ask you, is your girlfriend like way taller than you?"

Oh my god.

I narrowed my eyes at them, glaring.

He gestured and laughed nervously, "What? It's just we never really see her. She pops by at the door for two seconds, we don't get a good look."

Computer boy added, "Is she hot?"

I covered my face with my arm. I was so tired. These questions sucked.

I rubbed my eyes and moaned, looking out at them I stated matter-of-a-factly, "Yes, she's taller than me. Always has been. I don't know if she's hot, she's a total weirdo," and then I finished with a zing, "But at least I have a girlfriend!"

I stood up and went to the door.

They reached out to me, "Do you like her?" They said like, but it carried so much more weight.

"Obviously!" I grabbed the door handle.

Then, one boldly asked me, "Do you…" I watched his eyes shifted back and forth, "...fuck her?"

"Gross!" I yelled out and turned the doorknob, "Why do you gotta say it like that man?!"

"So you don't… does she…?" The computer annoying boy asked.

"Stop!" I threw the door open and exited. "Don't talk about her like that…" I grumbled as I marched out, knowing they could probably still hear me I even said, "...I love her."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Warnings: Sexual terms and mentions. Sexual activities. Also, its just a long chapter so strap in!

Risa Koizumi POV

Haha. I knew something Otani didn't. My plan was to evilly keep him guessing the whole time we were going out this weekend.

When he would come back to our hometown for the weekend it was awesome, because we could do stuff both days, Saturday and Sunday, because he could just stay the night at home. We couldn't hang out like in private at either of our houses, but we could at least see each other both days without someone having to travel back and forth.

Since school had started in the spring he'd only come back about one time and was kind of busy with family stuff. So, this time I was hoping we get to spend time together.

Over text, we made a deal: he'd pick out what we were doing Saturday and I'd decide on Sunday. I chose the last day so I could wait until then to tell him what Nobuko told me. Haha.

He, of course, decided on the usual karaoke and arcade hopping. The literal only thing he ever wanted to do. Which was fine since I enjoyed it so much too.

The whole time he was asking me, "What was your good news? What was the news?" And I just wasn't answering hahaha.

At one point he said, "I'm not buying you a soda unless you tell me!"

And I just started giggling. I got up out of my seat and teased, "Okay, then I'll buy it, cause I'm not telling~" I reached into my pocket for some coins, but nothing was there. "Oops. I didn't bring any money…" I cringed at him sitting down across from me, "Guess I'm not thirsty then."

He rolled his eyes. He pulled out his wallet from his back pocket, "Ugh I swear, you're so scatterbrained."

"Shut up!" I yelled back, "You're the stupid one who doesn't know the news!" Glaring, he handed me some money.

"Just get me one too, alright?" He tilted his head up, shooing me away.

Giggling, I told him, "Okay!"

That night, after he had walked me back to my house and before we parted ways, him and I hovered at my front gate. We had been talking about something, but I can't really remember what anymore. It was probably about music or something, but clearly, it was unimportant.

I looked lovingly at him ahead of me as his sentence came to an end. His hand was holding mine. As he stepped up onto the curb to open the gate, I squeezed his hand a little.

He turned, and I stared into his eyes. My heart was totally falling. I loved being around him so much. Even if we bickered the whole time or he called me stupid and scatterbrained. Even if he labeled me a giant or a giraffe, I wouldn't really care. Maybe I was just a big fool. But, I really loved him. I wanted to spend all my time with him.

A little confused, Otani met my glance. At first, he looked at me like something was wrong, but then a small, happy smirk appeared on his face. He pulled me in closer. His other hand fell on my arm.

He was a bit more boosted up than usual, standing in the curb, but I was still definitely taller.

Otani leaned in and up, and gave me a passionate kiss goodnight. I sighed out as I kissed him back. I wrapped my hand around his side, curving him into me.

After a few moments, he broke the kiss. He held me in a hug. His head resting on my chest. Squeezing me close, he muttered, "Night Koizumi."

"Goodnight," I whimpered, but I felt like I could start sobbing. "I love you!" I cried out.

His hand rubbed my back, soothingly. He spoke into my shoulder, "We'll see each other tomorrow. It's okay."

"Okay…" I whined, digging my face down into his neck. "I just…" I took a big heavy breath.

Up and down, he gently stroked my back as we hugged and held each other. "I know."

I let out through holding my tears back, "I want to be with you every day."

"I know," he repeated, almost in agreement rather than understanding.

I grabbed him tighter, and asked a question I had never flat out asked before. Usually, we danced around this topic in jokes and codes, "Don't you wish we could see each other more?"

His face pressed into my body, like he was hiding from me. Or maybe, he was seeking comfort from me. Not sure… Then, before ending the night he answered, "Yeah, I do."

For a moment he just stayed there.

I was forced to believe what he was saying. Figuring Otani out has always been so hard for me. Rarely does he express his feelings towards me. Usually, it's in our most intense moments. Like when we got back together right before his finals, Otani told me, "It turns out I love you more than I thought." And he hugged me just like this. Even though he was not the kind of boyfriend to be proclaiming his love for me every day, when stuff like this happened, how was I supposed to doubt him?

I figured he probably loved me, but you know it would be nice to hear it a little bit more.

And it'd be nice if he didn't try to take it back the next day!

The next day, Sunday morning, I woke up all excited and ready to share the information Nobuko told me. I decided our date today would be a picnic! I spent the last night and that morning preparing lunch for both him and I. Then, I called him and told him to meet me at the park.

The date went well. We were having fun talking about basic stuff, like people walking by or the flowers around us. He told me about this past week at school and I filled him in on my life. Eventually, he asked again, "Dare I ask… what this news you were gushing about over the phone?"

"I was not gushing!" I smacked him playfully with my chopsticks. "But…" A huge grin appeared on my face, accompanied by evil laughter.

Blank faced, his mouth and eyes went flat, "...What…"

I snickered, then spoke in my version of a flirty and super mysterious voice, "I know a time that we can be alone together," then I leaned in, down near his ear, and tried to whisper, but my excitement got the best of me, "~in private~"

Ruining any sex appeal, I laughed right after I said it. But, I caught Otani chuckling too, into his hand.

I wrapped my arm around him, "What's so funny?" His laughing got louder.

He waved me off, "Nothing, nothing." Putting his lunch down, he turned and looked at me, almost suggestively. I hadn't seen him this way before really, maybe it was a little like the second time he kissed on the roof, right after the first time. He told me, with a hint of playful doubt and hopeful sarcasm, "I know somewhere we could be alone right now," his eyes glanced down at his legs, "Not for long though, so there would be no worries about going too far…"

Oh.

He was staring back up at me.

Hmm.

I didn't think that was coming.

"But…" I whimpered, "Aren't you curious about what I know?"

He let out one big laugh, "Yeah, of course I am! Ha. Are you mad I stole your moment?" He giggled.

I squinted my eyes at him, "Ugh. Where's this place you know?"

He answered simply, like it was nothing, "My house. My mom and sister are at a play." He shifted his shoulders, "They won't be gone forever, but it's a little time, if you wanted."

He left it up to me.

"Okay, fine," I bugged my eyes out and folded my arms, "But I'm not telling you about my thing until after. You're gonna be dying to know."

Packing up his lunch and wrapping up mine for me, he said half-standing, "Oh yeah, totally." He mockingly begged me, "Please tell me!"

I rolled my eyes, but we were both laughing as we got up and left the park en route to his house. I don't know how I agreed so fast, but I didn't feel nearly as scared as I did last time. This weekend I wasn't expecting anything to happen between us. So, maybe the fact that I did not have all week to overthink everything really helped calm my nerves.

This time, I decided, carrying our boxes of half-eaten food away, I would just try to have a good time.

"Otani," I mumbled his name, while we walked side by side. He looked up at me and I turned my head to him.

"Hm?"

Smiling, I told him, "Let's just have fun this time."

A grin beamed across his face, "Yeah!"

Atsushi Otani POV

I brought Koizumi back to my house. It was a kind of risky move. I knew my sister and my mom would be out for quite a while, but if anything happened, like I don't know the play was canceled or the trains shut down, we'd be in big trouble.

It was around 2:30 now, and they said the play started at 3. So, maybe we'd have until around dinner time. I don't know. Everything was such a gamble. But I made the move anyway.

Koizumi and I had been alone in my childhood bedroom dozens of times. Hell, that's apparently where we had our first kiss. Not that I remember. My freaking fever!

Stepping in with her this time, I couldn't believe how much had changed since then between us.

Back then I was telling her, "I mean look at us. We're all alone in my bedroom and I'm not feeling any urge to make any kinda move on you." I remember adding in a, "And that's a pretty big problem."

Whatever my problem was, I definitely got over it, because here we were in my room so many months later and I was dying to put the moves on her. Maybe I finally got over my break up, or maybe Koizumi finally won me over completely.

She had kissed me one more time after that, while shouting at me. It was then, in the classroom all alone, she told me that I had stolen her first kiss. And then, and then… she grabbed me by my collar and kissed me, as she yelled at me about how she was quitting.

Her words played through my head for the longest time, "'Cuz even when you were all hot and dizzy with a fever you didn't see me as a girl. Not even for a split second." All I could think, stunned on the ground, was how that wasn't exactly true. She was crying, "No matter how long I stay in love with you nothing's gonna change between us, is it? Then I quit."

She was screaming at me. I couldn't get a word in and I didn't know how to say what I might have wanted to, "I quit! I'm through with this! I'm gonna quit being in love with you, so there!"

In my bedroom, I took a glance over at her. She was placing the box lunches she made on the table in the middle of my room. One hit the side of the table and bounced onto the floor. Koizumi bent down to pick it up, muttering and cursing to herself.

Suddenly, I felt the urge to hug her from behind. Wrapping my arms around her waist, she questioned me, "Huh?"

"Thanks for not quitting on me."

She chuckled, looking at the mess on the floor, "But I did quit."

I laughed too, "Yeah, but not for long."

She swiped at the box and picked up. I let her go, standing back up. She turned to face me after placing the box on the table and dumping the crumbs inside.

We both breathed out giggles. I looked over her. I'm sure I had a dirty-perverted kind of expression on my face, because Koizumi folded her arms over her stomach and said, "What?"

"Nothing," I smiled, lips shut and breathing out my nose.

She blushed, "Well, you're staring at me!"

I laughed lightly under my breath, then moved my eyes to my bed, which I actually made for once. How lucky! Or maybe… I did realize something like this was a possibility this morning and thought ahead.

She whipped her back to look where I was. She noticed the bed and I saw her face fall.

Crap! Was she getting worried?

Her eyes looked back at mine, wide and jittery.

"Koizumi," I gasped, my face painted with concern.

Out of nowhere she shook her head no.

I held my hands out to her, ready to comfort her, "It's okay, it's okay- we don't have to-"

I touched her arms, she whipped away a tear falling from her eyes.

"No, no," She said rapidly and sucked in her snot, "That's not it."

"Hey," I tried to speak softly. I recalled how nervous she was last time. How she wanted me to take the lead and how she wanted to put her shirt back on. "I really like you, Koizumi, I want to do things like this with you…" I came clean, "A lot."

She sniffled and brought her face up. We were staring into each other's eyes, and I could tell she was cheering up. "Okay, I'm sorry. I really do want to have fun," She chuckled, "No more crying." She gave me a weak smile.

I hugged her quickly and tightly, then backed up. "It's alright. You're a crybaby." I went to sit on the bed. "I already know that."

She joined me, "Well," Her eyes squinted at me, "You're annoying, I already know that!"

"Okay, Koizumi, whatever." I put my hand on her hand as she sat down next to me. I pushed into the bed as I leaned up to kiss her. She twisted down and kissed me back.

We made out for a little bit, but as we were I felt her hand fall on my leg. As she moved in even closer to me, I could tell things were heating up. I broke away, and jumped up onto my knees. She seemed very confused.

"Hey Koizumi," I started explaining myself, as I shifted my body around on top of the bed. "What if I go behind you and…" I sat behind her, throwing my legs to her side, my feet dangling off the bed. Her body between my thighs, sitting on the bed. Before I expanded upon my idea, I slipped my hands under her arms, "...and touched your boobs from here."

She laughed, "What?" More laughter, "Okay. If you want to."

"Oh, shut up," I mumbled. I wanted to make her feel good. Last time she got me off, but I was not able to do the same for her. I was pretty sure she wasn't going to let me touch her down there today either, this being a spur of the moment thing and all. So, my solution was to try and pleasure her as much as I could just from up here.

Reaching around her, I cupped her breasts in my hands. Obviously, she was a pretty flat-chested girl, I don't know if you knew that, but she got small boobs. Not that I really minded of course. Like, come on, I was still touching a girl's breasts and they weren't nothing either. They still felt really cool. I wasn't exactly sure what I was doing, but… I hate to admit this… but, when I looked at porn this week, I paid special attention to what the guy was doing to make the girl act so weird- I mean feel good. Haha.

I started off slow. I didn't want to freak Koizumi out by going full force all at once. For a little while, I just rubbed on top of her shirt with my palms. Then, I began to squeeze some.

She let out a little whimper. I whispered up to her ear, "Can I go under?"

After she nodded, I moved my hands down to the end of her shirt, then right up inside. Instead of going through the motions of taking her bra off, I pushed the whole thing up, and her boobs fell out from underneath.

"Otani!" She objected, whipping her head to look back at me.

My hands wavered barely a millimeter away from her breasts. I turned up at her, "Is it okay?" I asked and her face flushed red.

"Yeah…" She sighed out, shyly.

I stared into her eyes. My hands connected with her bare skin. "Come down," I told her.

She leaned her head down to mine and we started kissing again. This time, noticeably more desperate, as we reached for each other.

I kneaded her breasts, moving them around, trying not to be too rough, but also trying to make her feel good. Her hand slipped and slid back closer to my thigh, against the covers of the bed. She leaned significantly closer into me, to the point I was titled back a little. We weren't completely laying down yet or anything, but there were hints it might go there.

Taking a chance, since I felt like maybe she was enjoying herself, I used my fingers, rather than my palm and pinched at her nipples. I didn't do this really hard, mind you- It was like a slightly little press between my thumb and my pointer finger.

"E-Ah," She moaned out, and stopped kissing me. Her body backed upright, but my hands and fingers were still on her the same way.

I had to do something to save the move and make her feel okay. So, now that she was sitting up again, her head turned not all the way back around, but to the side, I moved my head into her neck. And right then, I kissed the side of her neck. A strong attack.

No longer could I see her reactions, but I heard her whisper out an, "Oh." So, hopefully everything was okay.

I felt her body turn back more as I kissed her. I hoped she was feeling some sort of pleasure from what I was doing with my hands and from how I was kissing her neck. But, how am I supposed to know what a real girl sounds like when she feels good? What if Koizumi acted differently?

"Otani…" She moaned my name this time, not like she was telling me to stop or that something freaked her out. It sounded like she said it in a good way, because then she huffed out a heavy, hot breath. She turned so much that I had to stop kissing her. Her leg went up on the bed, resting against my knee. It was almost like she was sitting sideways, leaning up on my leg, but she kept herself steady with her other foot planted on the floor.

Suddenly, I could see my hands under her shirt. In a decisive motion, I picked up her shirt and wedged my head down to her closer breast. "Don't freak out," I muttered right before I touched my mouth down to her boob.

Koizumi jumped up. She got right the hell off of me. Standing up now, she faced me, her arms against her hips.

"Hey!" She yelled, then looked oddly disappointed, "I wanted to do that to you!"

What?

Sitting, my legs spread wide apart, I chuckled to myself, "Koizumi… I don't have boobs…"

She rolled her eyes and pouted with her arms pumping down, "No! Not like that. It was gonna be my big surprise!"

I was taken aback, "What was?"

Her eyes looked down at the ground as she mumbled, "That I was gonna use my mouth…"

"Huh?!" I gasped loudly. "What do you mean?"

"Well…" Her gaze shifted back and forth, then landed on me, "Could you take your pants off again?"

My eyes widened, and I'm sure I smirked some. I questioned her a bit, wondering if I was being pranked, "Really...?"

She nodded her head. Her hands landed on my legs, "Yeah." Bending down, she looked up at me, and stated softly, "I wanna try."

Acting out of body, I felt my head nod along eagerly, "Okay." I shifted my body up on the bed, so my feet were touching the ground again. I was going to get up to take my pants off, but-

"You can just slide them down, right?" Koizumi said, avoiding eye contact. I saw her bite her lip and roll her shoulders.

"I guess…" I put my hands down to unbutton my pants, "You don't want me to take them all the way off?" I asked, kinda rudely, I can admit that.

"No," she shook her head, staring past me at the pillows on top of my bed, "It's just… Well, you can stay there… and I'll go…" She knelt down on the floor. Her hands resting on my lower thighs, she sat up on her knees.

Watching her, I really started realizing what she was planning to do. Her mouth. My pants. My legs spread out, her kneeling.

She's gonna suck my dick?!

"Oh," left my lips.

She was kneeling on the floor beneath me, while I was sitting up on my bed. This whole situation was crazy. I never thought she'd be actively doing this.

But, then again, Koizumi was kinda bold. She was always surprising me- or attacking me rather. She confessed to me, when I didn't even notice. She kissed me… out of anger for accidentally taking her first kiss. Yeah, I would describe her as bold, even if she is a crybaby a lot of the time. She has told me what's on her mind and snapped me out of my own slump more than a dozen times. So, maybe I shouldn't have been so shocked that she was making some moves too.

She pressed her hand against my leg, leaning some of her weight on me. I could feel her arm shaking, as she watched me and waited.

But, I was too stunned to really do anything. I hovered at the zipper of my pants. I was ready to pull them down, but just her being down there was enough to psyche me out.

What if I have it all wrong?

My plan had been to focus on her, but when she's making crazy moves like this how can a guy not get excited? Damn, I wish I had the willpower to resist her.

Her head tilted up at me. She half-groaned for me to hurry the heck up, and half-bit her lip out of nervousness, "Otani… Come on…"

"Right!" I stuttered. Too fast, I tore my pants down, hitting her hands on my legs. My pants bunched up there.

Her hands stayed there for a moment, curled up underneath. Koizumi started to ramble, almost speaking to herself. She was talking very quickly, like she was possessed or something. Her eyes stared down at my pants crumpled up on my thighs, by her hands. She said, "I don't really know what I am doing, so it's okay if you have to correct me. I won't care if you tell me something isn't right. I'd rather you tell me if I am doing something wrong. I've never done this before, but I kinda want to try. I hope that's okay-"

I cut her off, "Koizumi," by grabbing her hands under the folds of my partly taken off pants, she began to calm down. "What are you talking about?"

"Hmm?"

"I just…" My confusion became apparent. "I'm not sure what you're wanting to do."

"Well," her face flushed bright pink, her posture sat up, "I was going to try doing what we did last time, but using my mouth this time."

"Oh?" I might have smirked a bit, "You know what that is?"

Her eyes jerked up at me, wide. She shook her head, "No! No! No! I-I- My brother!" She screamed in defense, but I just laughed.

I pulled her hands out, and they dropped on my legs, above my pants. She was touching my skin again. I gave her a smile, "I don't care," snickering, I told her, "I was just teasing you…. I wanted to hear you say it."

She glared at me and grunted, "Screw you!"

Cocky, I laughed, turned my head. I threw my hands up behind my head like a king, and cackled, "Who would've thought this morning that you'd be offering to give me a blow job?"

A/N: Thanks for reading! This was kind of a long one, but it made the most sense to break it up here! Hope you enjoyed it!


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Warning: Sexual terms and mentions. Sexual activities.

Risa Koizumi's POV

Gosh, I was so freaking nervous. I must have been shaking, but I was really trying to play it confident and cool. I hoped he couldn't tell I was super inexperienced and didn't know what I was doing at all. To hide my mental panic… Since I really did just want to have fun tonight- and maybe doing this in such a spur of the moment manner was helping my nerves- I rubbed my hands around his legs, getting over to the sides of his thighs.

I pushed myself up and leaned in between them. I had to move his legs apart from each other a little bit. He was kinda laughing at me, which kinda made me mad. But, then again, I couldn't really blame him. I probably did look kinda silly.

I wanted to move my head in right then, but his stupid underwear was still there! He totally messed up my move. It was supposed to be one swift motion, like in the video I took from my brother's room…. Wait. What?

But now I had to deal with his underwear in the way. I started very quickly losing my confidence. "Otani…" I mumbled staring at his boxers covering his crotch, "Can you take these off too?"

"Hmm?" He looked down at me and we matched eyes for a second. I felt so embarrassed. I was supposed to be acting like I knew what I was doing. Ugh, I wanted to kinda take the lead, after I made him do everything last time.

"No, wait!" I objected to my own question, "Uh…" I narrowed my eyes at the waistband of his boxers. "I'll do it!"

Rapidly, mostly because I was scared, I reached up and ripped at his underwear like I was tearing a bandaid off.

"Whoa!" He screamed, "Koizumi!" His legs curled up, like a knee jerk at the doctors. He grabbed onto my shoulders.

I pulled his underwear down, but he was still sitting so it just kinda bunched up on his upper legs.

Otani breathed out hard, relaxing, "Jeez, Koizumi, could you do that a little less violently?!"

"Sorry!" I shouted back and then became shockingly aware of the fact I could see his penis rising up out of the mess of underwear and pants. After a few long seconds of staring at it, I tilted my head up to look Otani in the face. I asked him, "Can I start?"

His face was red. He nodded yes, silently and slightly.

"Okay," I muttered. I positioned my hands on his legs and pushed myself upwards. I cranked my neck around, down near his penis. One of my hands came off of his legs and started moving towards holding it.

But then, I hesitated, I jolted my head up to look at him again. I rambled, "Listen. I don't really know what I am doing, so if I am doing it wrong or it hurts you can tell me. I'm sorry if its not any good, I just this is my first time-"

He laughed to himself, "Koizumi, it's okay."

I sighed, "Alright, I'm just saying you can let me know if it's not right."

He rolled his eyes, "Okay~" He spoke more seriously, but maybe he was still kinda joking around, "But, I'm sure you'll do great."

Either way, I smiled.

My nerves relaxed. And I felt my hand land around Otani's penis. For a moment I watched myself touch him. The longer I held onto him, the harder his penis started to feel in my hand. I knew what my next move should be. This was still just the same thing I did last time. This was a handjob, but I wanted to keep going- It was just taking me a minute.

I began to roll my head forward, down closer. Completely focused, I was almost paying no attention to Otani's reactions. I had about no idea if he was enjoying what I was doing or if he was hating it. As usual, we were a little out of sync. I was just trying so hard to keep my mind on getting through my next move.

Then, I touched my lips to the tip of his penis. Breathing out slightly, I hung there for a second. I slid my one hand all the way down. I might have heard Otani say my name… or something, but I didn't pay any attention. Instead, I opened my mouth a little bit more, pushing him in, between my lips. Slowly, the tip of my tongue touched his-

"Koizumi!" He shouted loudly, almost out of control. His hands were on my shoulders.

I peered up at him. His face was bright red and sweaty. I looked into his eyes as if to ask, "what?"

He huffed out, "When it happens, should I let it out outside or…?"

I back away, taking his penis out of my mouth for a second, "The white stuff?"

He almost laughed in my face, "Yeah the white stuff."

"Oh," I thought for a second, then made my decision, "Whatever you want is fine." And I smiled a little, trying to look cute… which I think actually worked for once. Haha.

At first, Otani seemed surprised, but then he shrugged and smirked, "Well ok, if you're sure you won't mind… I'll probably let it out in your mouth."

I may or may not have smirked too, "Whatever."

Getting back to business, I connected my lips to his hard penis again. My hand, holding at the bottom. Eventually, not without a few quiet moans from my short boy, I moved my mouth down his length.

When his hands grabbed onto the back of my head, I kinda knew what was going to happen. Pushing down deeper, I could feel him taking up the room inside my mouth. I wasn't sure just what to do with my tongue, but I could tell he was feeling good. It was like he kept getting bigger or something.

He pressed on my head and muttered my name again, "Koizumi," this time with a bit of panic and urgency. "I'm gonna…"

I braced myself, closing my eyes. This was going to be the first time anything like this had ever happened to me. In the end, I'm proud I took it so bravely.

"God," He puffed out under his breath. He pushed my head in and his hips forward. I felt his penis hit deeper in my throat. For a second, I was scared I might choke, so I sucked in a big sniff of air. Then, he released.

Liquid rushed into my mouth. Not an overwhelming amount, but like a decent amount. I didn't choke, thank god.

He backed away from me, taking his penis out of my mouth and letting his hand slip away from my head.

The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was his eyes staring down at me. He had a tired, but happy look on his face. Like he had just caught his breath and was starting to smile.

I must've smiled back at him just a little. He said to me, "Thanks Koizumi," and reached out his hand. He wiped at my lips, tilting my chin up, "Sorry if it tastes bad."

He pulled his fingers away and I could see some of the white stuff. Some might have spilled out of my mouth afterward I guess.

I gulped hard. Then, I was finally able to give him a big grin, "That's okay, I just hope it felt good!"

Otani chuckled and avoided the subject, "I just wished I could do something for you, but- Nevermind." He picked up his underwear and pants bunched you under his legs and shimmied them back into place.

I stood up. My hands fell onto my hips, "Maybe next time, okay?"

"Ha," he laughed, taunting me, "When's that?"

I folded my arms across my chest and turned dramatically, like I was all upset, "Well maybe you'd know if you cared-"

"What?!" He balked, "Come on, are you still mad I didn't let you tell your secret?"

"Yes!" I humphed.

"Fine," he stood up, his fly undone, and ran around to face the front of me. "What is it?" He stared up into my eyes, "I really wanna know."

Damn it. He trapped me. I can't even pretend to be mad at him for very long.

"Nobuko said Nakao is taking a trip to Hokkaido so they can see each other during the long weekend, and she said we could come visit with him and stay… in her grandma's guest house... If we wanted to..." I lifted my eyebrows to really cue what I was getting at, in case he was too dense to understand.

Which Otani definitely is way too dense! Our history has taught me that!

Atsushi Otani POV

At some point that night, my mom and sister came home. By that point though, Koizumi and I were back downstairs- with our clothes on. We were playing video games, but I was mostly watching her get way too into it and kick my ass. I wasn't really a video game guy. At least half of the games in my house were ones Koizumi left here in high school, so she could play them when she was over.

I hadn't been home in a while, since college started. Usually, she would come to visit me. My family dropped me off there, but besides that, it had been a few months really since I saw everyone. Now, Koizumi was saying we might go see our friends over the break. Honestly, I was kinda excited.

I mean, there were some other reasons I was excited besides just seeing our friends, but… well my mom was home now. I had to keep my dirty thoughts on the down-low.

Koizumi threw up the controller, shouting, "I won! I won!" She caught it in her lap.

I groaned.

My sister made fun of me from the kitchen, "Don't you ever win Atchan?"

"Shut up."

All of them started laughing at me. Typical.

Koizumi turned back to me. Her eyes lit up. "Can we play again?"

She looked so happy.

"It's getting late, you two," My mother added. "Atchan, maybe you should walk Koizumi home."

I got up off the couch. I grabbed Koizumi's arm, she sat on the floor unmoving. "Obviously." I pulled at her to get up.

She pouted, "Aw, I wanted to play one more round."

I looked down at her, frustrated, "Will you stop with the video games?!"

She started to stand up, "You're just mad I beat you every time."

"No," we walked towards the door, "I couldn't care less about your stupid video games, I'm not a loser like you."

"A loser?!" She slipped her shoes on, "Is that what you think of me? But… I won…" Her voice sounded upset.

I picked a jacket off of the hooks. "No, I don't think you're a loser, gosh."

"Oh, okay," I handed Koizumi her jacket, then went back to get mine.

"You're so weird," I stated. And we were both ready to leave, "Bye mom!"

"Bye everybody!" Koizumi waved as she walked out, and I followed behind her, closing the door.

When we stepped outside, she was laughing to herself. "I love your mom! And your sister too, they're great!"

I walked a little faster to stand beside her, "Ok, weirdo."

"What? I just miss going over to your house."

I chuckled, "You don't go there when I'm not home?"

"No!" She objected.

"I wouldn't put it past you," I teased her, "You did come over and attack me when I was sick once!"

"That is so not what happened!" She threw her arms out.

"I know, I know."

I took one of her hands in mine.

"Besides," she said, "It's not like that anymore, right? You didn't have a fever this time?"

"No Koizumi," I rolled my eyes, "You don't have to ask every time we do anything if I have a fever."

"I know," She smiled and kicked her leg out a little bit. We walked silently together for a little bit. The sky was pitch black and we were walking between the light from street lamps. Even though it was night, I was feeling hotter than I expected.

Koizumi sighed happily, she told me, "It's so warm out!"

"I guess it really is almost summer."

"Yeah."

I looked straight ahead of us, "Hey Koizumi," But I could feel her eyes looking at me, "When we go on that trip, with Nakao and Nobuko… how long will we be away?"

"Oh," Koizumi paused, "I don't really know. I guess I could ask her. I would think a couple of nights. She said long weekend, so maybe Friday to Sunday or Monday?

I nodded, "Okay, so like 3 or 4 nights?"

"Yeah, I mean, I guess."

I rubbed my thumb on her hand, "And you're okay staying with me that long?"

"Um… Yeah, I think so."

"Okay," I tried to show I could be understanding, "If you need to stay with Nobuko, it's alright, I won't get mad at you."

Her walking paced slowed down, but I kept pushing ahead, "Okay… but I don't think I want to stay with her. I think I want to stay with you, so what's the problem?"

"There's not a problem, Koizumi," I turned back to face her. Her hand slipped out of mine. "It's just I thought you felt weird staying with me overnight, like last time-"

"No!" She cried out, desperately, "Not anymore, okay? I trust you."

We stared intensely into each other's eyes. Only half of her face was lit up by the lights.

"Okay," I stated seriously, maintaining eye contact, "We don't have to do something every night."

She glanced down at my hand, then back to me. She nodded and stepped forward, taking my hand again, "Okay," I grabbed on to her and we walked, "But, I think I might be ready."

I whipped my head to the side to look at her. I tried to read her expression, but we were in the dark between street lamps. "Ready?" I asked.

"Soon," She responded. "Maybe. Like if summer break is a few weeks away, I think I could be ready by then." She took a second, "Maybe."

He laughed a little under my breath, "Okay, there's no pressure. Alright?"

She laughed too, "Yeah, I know, but…"

"Yeah," I breathed out, "I wanna do it too."

The light flashed back on her. I looked over her face, but she was staring ahead. "Koizumi," She turned to me, "Lean down."

She bent over and I pushed myself up. I leaned in and gave her a kiss.

When we parted, I told her, "Keep working hard until summer break, okay? Then, we can just have fun."

She smiled, her eyes opening back up slowly, "Okay." She pulled her hands in close to her body, so my arm was out to keep holding her hand. "And you'll work hard too right?"

"Yeah," I said like it was obvious, "But I'm not the one I'm worried about."

She rolled her eyes, "Yeah, yeah, I'll work hard. Leave me alone. It's easy when I actually care about the stuff, like with fashion. It's just my stupid classes and professors that are so annoying! Like why should I do the work if you're boring me to death?!"

I laughed out, loudly.

Koizumi doesn't really change, does she?

Even if she is ready to let me touch her, or even if she is ready for sex, she's still gonna be the biggest loser I know.

"Hey!" She threw her arm up, taking my shoulder out with her, "Don't laugh at me!"

"Sorry, you're just too funny!"

"Gah! Wait! Let me try to be sexy!" She called out.

I was uncontrollably laughing, "No, god please don't."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Warnings: Not much, some sexual mentions and sexual talk. Next chapter is the big mature one. 

Risa Koizumi POV

After almost a month of school and work, and not seeing Otani in person, it was finally (almost) time for our trip to Hokkaido. With Nobuko and Nakao, of course. The night before we were supposed to leave, we were actually leaving on Thursday, not Friday like I thought, Nobuko called me to make sure I was packing. Which, of course, I wasn’t.  
She sounded really excited and I was super happy for her. She sounded happy for me too. It was so great now that both of us were the annoying people with boyfriends. It sucked when it was just her in the relationship. I mean her and Nakao are super cute, but it was painful having to watch them be happy when Otani was being such a freaking idiot!  
But, it's all okay now that we’re together. And it’ll be fun to all be out on like a couple’s trip together. Nobuko and Nakao are going to be staying in her grandmother’s house, but since there are only enough bedrooms for them, Otani and I are staying in the guesthouse. I supposed that could have been the other way around. Like Nobuko and Nakao have been together much longer, they could have stayed in the separate house, but I do think it would be a little weird if Otani and I were staying with her grandma, without her.  
Maybe Otani wasn’t totally crazy when he was questioning if I would be okay staying in a room alone with him for a couple nights. I had been weird about that in the past. But, so much has happened. Things have changed. I mean, we like kinda hooked up in his dorm room and then we kinda hooked up in his bedroom too. It wasn’t like Otani and I hadn’t done stuff now. And It wasn’t like I didn’t want to do more this weekend.  
On the phone, Nobuko was telling me about all the places she wanted us to visit. She was also trying to get me in on a plan to make the boys take us shopping… and maybe pay for everything… haha.  
“So, Risa,” Her tone changed, “Do you and Otani have any plans?”  
“What do you mean?” I asked, plainly.  
“Like night plans…?”  
Blank-faced I threw the question back at her, “Do you and Nakao?”  
“Duh!” She shouted back into the phone.  
“Well…” I started, “Maybe…”  
“Wait what?!” She sounded shocked, “Really?”  
“Yeah,” I objected, “Is it that surprising!”  
“Yes! Risa I thought you were all nervous and stuff!”  
I threw a bathing suit into a bag on my floor, “I am! But I wanna try… with Otani.”  
“Oh my gosh!” She sounded way more excited than I was. “Wait, Risa are you guys really ready for that?”  
I held a t-shirt in my hands, contemplating, “Wait! I don’t know, I have to ask him.”  
Pulling my phone down from between my shoulder blade and ear, I told Nobuko, “Nobu, one second, I’ll call you back!”  
The t-shirt dropped to the floor in a heap. I texted Otani as fast as I could, so I didn’t forget before the actual, uh, event. I sent the text, rapid-fire.  
Then, called Nobuko back, “Okay, I asked him. Now, we should be ready. Hopefully.”  
Nobuko giggled on the other side of the phone, “Risa, that’s not what I meant, but I guess that answers the question if you’re ready.”  
“Oh, what did you mean?”  
I could feel her shaking her head at me, “I meant like are you ready, emotionally, but whatever. Forget it.”  
“Oh…” I stood still in my room, coming to a realization, “Oops.”

Atsushi Otani POV

There I was in my dorm room, revising my last paper, before I could get ready to leave for summer break. I was trying to get all my work done early, so I did not have to worry about it while we were on our trip to Hokkaido.  
Then, my phone buzzes and it is my weirdo girlfriend texting me.  
Like a clueless idiot I happily go to check it like it won’t be something weird, even though she is a big weirdo- my mistake.  
I go over to my bed to pick up my phone. I am standing in the middle of my dorm room, my two roommates in there with me. I open the message and it reads:  
‘Condoms.  
Do you have any? Nobu asking.’  
Um what?  
Frozen. I leave my body, in the middle of my crowded dorm room.  
It takes me at least a few minutes to recover, before I call her.  
She picks up her phone immediately. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” She starts shouting the second she answers.  
“What?” I mumble into the phone.  
“That’s not what she meant! That’s not what she meant! I’m so stupid!”  
“What?” I repeat. Robotically.  
“I… I… she asked me if we were ready. And, I’m sorry, that’s what I thought she was asking about.”  
“What?”  
“You know,” Koizumi continued, “Like ‘are you guys ready? Do you have protection?’ And I didn’t know the answer to that, so I thought I would ask you right away, before I forgot.”  
“Wha-”  
“Like, because it would be bad if this weekend, we were about to… And you-we didn’t have a condom.”  
“What?”  
“Can you stop saying what?! You’re freaking me out! I said I was sorry!” She yelled and I snapped out of my haze.  
“I’m just a little taken aback, Koizumi!” I raised my voice.  
“I know, I’m sorry.”  
“I don’t understand why Nobuko would be asking…”  
Koizumi defended, “She wasn’t! I misunderstood! I’m sorry!”  
“But you were still talking about it!” I hissed into the phone.  
“Yeah, well…” She had no defense for that. I guess I should have expected she would tell her best friend everything. “So um…” She hesitated, carefully planning how to address this topic, “Do you have any?” She asked, her voice quieter.  
“No,” I admitted. I lowered my voice too, convinced my roommates could hear everything we were talking about, even though they didn’t know the situation at all, “I didn’t think you were that ready…” I covered my mouth and whispered into the phone, “But I can get some.”  
She spoke, her voice letting on that she was embarrassed, “Okay, I um… I don’t know… I guess… Maybe I’m…”  
“Hey,” I whispered, “It’s okay. I’ll get some, either way, just in case.”  
“Okay,” She sounded happier, and more comfortable. “Love you.”  
“Mmhmm, don’t send me any weird texts okay.”  
She laughed and hung up on me. I closed my phone and caught my roommates staring at me. Not addressing that at all, I went back to my desk and finished up my paper, quickly, since I still had to go to the store tonight- apparently.

Risa Koizumi POV

“Risa!” Nobuko shouted from the porch of her grandmother’s house.  
“Nobu!” I yelled back, running up to her. I dropped my bag down halfway there.  
She hopped down the stairs and we embraced in a big hug.  
“I thought you’d never make it!” She cried out.  
Even though Otani and I left for Hokkaido in the morning, the sun was about to go down by the time we finally got to Nobuko’s grandmother’s house.  
Nakao was already there. He had clearly gotten here way before us. He looked calm and comfortable. I peeked past Nobuko and up at him. He waved out to Otani.  
Breaking our hug, Nobuko and I looked back at Otani, who threw a casual wave back to his friend. I could have cried seeing my best friend again, but I guess a silent wave was enough for the two of them. Jeez.  
Nobuko held my arm with two hands, “Risa, did you guys get lost?”  
I avoided the question. And I think Otani wanted to too, because he suddenly walked over and picked up my bag. He walked by us and towards the house. He asked Nakao, and Nobuko’s grandmother, “Where should I put these?”  
Nakao pointed to the guest house in the back.  
“Risa!” Nobuko raised her voice, “You did get lost! Didn’t you guys?”  
“Maybe…”  
“I gave you instructions! Did you forget them?”  
I looked down at her, “No! I didn’t forget them…” I shrugged, “They were just hard to understand.”  
She grumbled, squinting at me.  
“What?!” I backed up, “We got here eventually didn’t we?”  
“Ugh, you’re impossible. It shouldn’t have taken you hours.”  
I itched the back of my neck, “Well, we kinda fought over the instructions… and then, well, we saw these little boats you could rent when we got off the train so-”  
“Risa!” She threw her arms down, “You guys got distracted?!”  
I smiled awkwardly, “Yeah… Sorry.”  
Nobuko put her head in her hands, “Ugh, can’t say I’m surprised. Well, whatever, I’m glad you’re here now. Let me show you around the guest house.”  
“Thanks,” I followed behind her as we crossed the yard, and Nakao joined us, “I’m happy to see you guys. I missed you!”  
Nobuko grinned back at me, “You kinda ruined my plans for the day Risa.”  
“I said I’m sorry.”  
She rolled her eyes, laughing under her breath, “Fine. But we’re going to see the sunset on the mountain tonight!”  
“Okay!” I bounced, happily. 

“Whoa!” I gasped, so excited to see the place we’d be staying at for the next few days. I glanced over at the boys, and could see stars lighting up in Otani’s eyes. He had dropped our bags down right by his feet.  
“We’re staying here?” He asked.  
Nobuko spoke in a hushed down, “Yeah…”  
“Wow!” I exclaimed, jumping up to explore the place. There was a living room and kitchen, which were kind of connected together, along with the dining room. Really it was all just one room.  
“I know it’s kinda small…” Nobuko mumbled.  
“It’s so cool though!” I grabbed her hand, and basically repeated Otani, “We get to stay here? All by ourselves?”  
“So cool!” Otani told Nakao, “What’s your place like?”  
Nakao shrugged, “Kinda… grandma-y.”  
“But Nobu’s grandma’s a hippy.”  
Nakao smiled and held up a finger, “Exactly.”  
“Oh,” Otani shut his mouth.  
I flopped down on the couch. There wasn’t much room at all between the couch and the coffee table. The place was really small. I was pretty sure there was only one bedroom and one bathroom. “This is so adult!” I yelled.  
“I know,” Otani rushed over to the arm of the couch. “You guys can hang out here too. We could make dinner or breakfast one day!”  
“Yeah!” I looked over the couch at Nobuko, “Like we’re a family or something!” I started rambling to myself, “You guys could be the mom and dad and then Otani and I could be the kids- well wait I don’t wanna be brother and sister. Shoot. Maybe we could be sisters and Otani and Nakao are our husbands!”  
Otani smacked the back of my head, “Will you can it?”  
“Hehe.”  
“I have stuff planned, you know!” Nobuko protested. “If you wanna make a meal one time maybe we can, but there are places I’ve been waiting to try until you guys came.”  
“Aw!” I jumped up and ran over to hug her. “I’m sorry Nobu-Chan! I wanna do your stuff with you too! I missed you so much!” I may or may not have started to tear up.  
She rubbed my back, “It's okay, Risa, really. Thank you.” She pulled me apart from our hug, “How about we go watch the sunset, huh?”  
I whipped my tears away, “Okay.” 

A/N: Thanks for reading and leaving kudos! Leave a comment and let me know how you're enjoying the story so far! :) Things will get steamy soon I promise.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Warnings: Sexual language, sexual actions. Mature.

Atsushi Otani POV

After climbing Mount Hakodate and watching the sunset with our friends, Koizumi and I were finally back in the guesthouse. Alone.

The sunset did look really cool. And Koizumi leaned over on my shoulder halfway through. We were both telling each other how awesome the lights looked. Nobuko went on and on about the views from the mountain. How it looked in the winter. Nakao listened to her closely, and the two of them stared out at the sun disappearing.

When I was sure Nakao and Nobuko couldn't see, I held onto Koizumi's hand.

The sun fell behind the skyline.

We broke away from Nakao and Nobuko once we got back to her grandmother's house. I opened the door to the guesthouse for Koizumi. She was trying to tell me some jokes about sunsets. "The sun set, set sun-denly."

She walked in, and I shrugged a laugh out, "I wanted to see the sunset, but I mist it."

"Ha!" She broke out into loud, heavy laughter.

Maybe I could feel some tension in the air, but she wasn't noticing it. She kicked off her shoes at the door and threw her bag on one of the coat handles. "That was a lot of fun, but I'm pooped!" She exclaimed, freely.

Stretching out her arms and back, she walked past the little living room into the tiny kitchen. I took off my shoes slowly, watching her. I wasn't sure exactly how to approach this.

Taking a leap of faith, and a big step over to where she was, I began talking to her, "Hey, Koizumi, do you think now, tonight, would be a good time?"

"For what?" She asked blankly, pulling at the handle to the fridge. But then her eyes matched with me. She suddenly started to blush. "Oh-" she almost sounded out, but I put my knee up on one of the stools at the bar in the kitchen. I pushed my body upwards towards her. Her hand slipped away from the fridge and she leaned in.

I kissed her across the counter. We were very close to making out, the amount of time we held the kiss. My eyes shut and it's almost as if I could feel that something was going to happen tonight.

"Come on," I said, pulling away and taking my knee down. Letting go of her shirt collar too. At some point, I had grabbed on to it, in order to pull her in. I motioned towards the short hallway that led down to the bedroom.

"Wait!" She called, "We just stepped through the door. You want to go already?!" She sounded surprised.

Was she that clueless?

Walking down the hallway, I turned back to her and shrugged my shoulders. My arms gestured like, duh this is obvious. "Uh, yeah!" I bugged my eyes out, making fun of her, then turned back for the bedroom.

I could hear Koizumi chase after me.

"So, you're not even gonna give me a second to prepare?" I could hear her complain, or uh, wine, or no that's not a good word either… nag… that's worse!

I knelt down on the floor next to our bed. I reached for my bag and started digging through it.

"No," I responded, "You'll just overthink everything if we wait right?"

She groaned, "Ugh, I guess." She hovered over me, "I just don't want to rush things either."

I ruffled through my bag, pulling it closer to me so I could see. "I know, I know, if you really need a minute, you can have a minute. I just don't want you to get caught up thinking something dumb."

"I do not think dumb things, you're dumb!" She yelled.

I chuckled, "Okay, well, it'd be so like, you to go to the bathroom for a couple of minutes, and come out crying saying stuff like I don't like you and I don't even want to have sex with you."

I found what I was looking for in my bag, so I peeked back and up at Koizumi. Her expression made me realize that maybe I had said too much or been a little too straightforward.

"Do you…?"

"What?" I answered in a knee-jerk response, fueled by reflex and panic.

"What are you getting from your bag?" She pointed and asked.

"Oh," I pulled my hand out, revealing the box of condoms I had bought a few nights ago.

She bent down, looking at them curiously, "Oh my gosh! Are these them?"

I nodded, "Mmhmm."

She turned to me, "Did the cashier say anything? Or did they give you a weird look?"

I laughed. She took the box from me and inspected it, which only made me laugh to myself more.

Her eyes tilted over to me, "So you do really want to…?"

Reaching over, I took her hand. I began to stand up, bringing up back up with me. "Yes," I told her, rolling my eyes just a little, "And not just to have sex with you, okay?! You've been doing a lot for me lately, and I want to return the favor. I'm taking this stuff out…" I pointed to the condoms in her other hand and looked her dead in the eyes, "Just in case. If we get there, great, if not, that's okay. Alright?"

She sighed, taking a seat on the bed. She placed the box on the side table. "Alright." We smiled and just looked at each other for a minute. I stared into her big eyes, waiting for the okay. Then, she said to me, "You can do what you want."

I smirked, ecstatic, "Oh my gosh!"

Her smile got wider too, almost like she was laughing at me, but it's fine.

"I'm gonna jump ya!" I sprung into action, hopping up onto the bed and knocking Koizumi over too. She laid back and laughed and laughed.

I kissed her neck. She started to giggle. I just kept repeatedly kissing her, over and over so it tickled even more. I loved teasing her.

"Haha, stop! Hahaha!" She cried.

"Okay…" I said, suspiciously stopping. But then, I attacked her stomach. Tickling her all over with my hands.

"Ah! Haha!" Her knees bent up to kick me and her elbows came down to fight me off. "It's too much! It tickles!" She yelled, laughing between each breath.

"Mercy?" I asked.

"Mercy! Mercy! I give up!"

I cackled evilly and sat up, bent over on my knees at her side. "Fine, fine. I win!"

"You win! You win!" Koizumi looked up at me, laying on her back. Her eyes shining from the reflection of the light above our heads. She flashed a big smile.

And I couldn't help it. I just had to kiss her.

My head fell down. My lips crashed into hers.

Our kiss started heating up and getting more intense. I felt myself press down against her. My hand went over to hold her cheek and pull her in. I licked at her parted lips.

"Ot-" She stuttered, then stopped. Our tongues connected inside her mouth. I crept up onto her body, leaning over her sideways.

"Mmm," I could hear my voice come out, but I didn't mean for it to. I shut my eyes and kissed her hard… Before pulling away.

"Ha…" She breathed out, watching as I backed my head up. I had placed my hand on the bed by her cheek and pushed myself up over her.

Carefully, I brought my eyes down across her body. My gaze dragging along her long torso, until… I was staring at the buckle of her belt.

Her shirt had slipped up just the tiniest bit. Not enough to show her belly button, but just a peek at her stomach.

For a second I peeked back up at her, matching her eyes to mine. She seemed happy and almost calm. I really hoped she'd feel that way after. I was a bit nervous about exactly how I was going to do everything I wanted to do… to her… My moves probably were not going to be as smooth as I wanted them to be. But I tried my hardest. I wanted to be strong for her, I wasn't gonna let her know how nervous she made me sometimes.

"Koizumi," I muttered, bringing my hand down. I pressed my palm to her stomach pointing my fingers down.

"Yeah?" Her head tilted back a bit and her big eyes stared up at me.

I asked in a whisper, "Do you wanna undo your belt for me?"

My eyes flashed down to her waistline, where a stylish belt held up her jeans.

If she took the belt off, I could probably slip my hand under without having to make her see everything.

From our previous experiences, I knew Koizumi was a bit freaked out or uh, hesitant about letting me touch or see her private area. She had let me touch her boobs, and then she let me see them. So, I thought maybe it would be a good idea to put my hand down there first. Then, later, when she was more comfortable, I could actually see everything. I thought that was a pretty genius plan, not gonna lie.

"Okay."

I watched as her hands came down. She lifted the belt out of the buckle and threw the two ends to the side. Her hands stalled at the button of her jeans.

"Should I-?" She asked, a hint of shakiness coming into her voice.

See, I was right, the idea of taking her pants all the way off probably would freak her out. I'm so smart.

I grabbed one of her hands, comfortingly, "It's okay, just a little. I don't need to take your pants off."

"Oh, alright," She shrugged, in a bouncy sort of way, and undid the button. With my hand, I pulled down the zipper about halfway.

"Try to relax, okay?" I half-joked.

"Okay, okay," she moved her hands away, down by her side, "I trust you."

"Heh," a little chuckle escaped my mouth, so I went with it, "Good girl."

The zipper down all the way and the top of her jeans opened, I was able to slip my fingers down into her pants. I stayed over her underwear for the time being and pushed my hand down farther.

"Otani!" Her voice spiked, "Can you talk to me? I don't want to freak out, I really don't, and I think it would help if-" Panic started sneaking up on her.

"Yeah, yeah," I replied quickly. My hand inching down, almost at her crotch. "It's cool, don't freak out."

I'll tell her what I'm doing. Maybe that'll help!

I brought my head up. I was going to have to go about this blind anyway, with her pants covering everything, so I might as well look at her the whole time. If it was going to make her feel better who cares. I wanted her to be comfortable because I really did think she wanted to do this too.

Her face was flushed. She seemed one step away from panicking, but she was trying really hard to resist.

"Hey," I spoke in my coolest, calmest voice possible, "I'm not doing anything scary, okay? I'm just gonna stay right here," My fingers stopped when I thought I felt what I was looking for.

A slight bump in her underwear.

"I'm gonna rub this a little, okay? Nothing major."

I pressed my middle finger into her underwear a little. My other two fingers surrounded the bump.

This had to be it, right?

I hoped it was because I had to play like I was super confident.

Koizumi was taking deep breaths, closing her eyes, and mumbling, "Okay, okay."

"Can you spread your legs apart a little bit?" I asked, "I think it's gonna feel good, I promise."

Her legs separated slightly. I spun the tip of my middle finger around the top of it, pointer and ring finger pulsed randomly on the side.

"Whoa," slipped out of her mouth.

I moved my middle finger out, still pushing in with my other fingertips, but now I was using my knuckle on top of the bump. I could feel an indent and a little bit of wetness further back on Koizumi's underwear.

I let my fingers creep forward, without telling her. My middle and pointer alternated touching the dip in her underwear.

"Mm," Her lips pressed together and she looked at me through half-shut eyes. Her nose flared. I think I had been getting this right. It looked and sounded like she was feeling good, well good enough. So, maybe I did actually find her clit on the first try, without even looking.

I'm cooler than I think.

I let out a snicker. "Hey Koizumi," my hand rubbing at her down her pants, above her underwear, and my head over hers. I was sideways across her body, looking down, "Have you ever…?

She shook her head.

"Never?" I questioned and doubted.

"No," her eyes shifted, "Not down there."

My pinkie finger traced the outline of her underwear.

She admitted to me, eyes almost glazed over, "I've only touched my boobs."

My eyeline drooped down to her boobs for a second, then I looked back at her. I could feel that I was almost squinting too, my eyelids felt so low, "Do you wanna do… whatever you do… now?" I think there was a cackle under my voice, almost like I was teasing her.

Her hands jumped up to cover her breasts, "What? Like with you watching me?!"

"Yeah," I continued rubbing my fingers up against her underwear. "So, I can watch you, while I do this."

Her eyes darted at me, like she was questioning why she would get in bed with a guy like me in the first place.

I nodded, doubling down, "I think you'll feel really good if you do. You can close your eyes if you need to." Her hands started going up her shirt, her protest did not last very long. "And Koizumi," I added.

"What?" She scolded up at me.

I tilted my head, cracking my neck a bit, "I think I'm…" my fingers tiptoed to the edge of her underwear, at her crotch, "I'm gonna start really touching you."

Her eyes went wide.

"But first," I laughed, "I wanna kiss you!"

She cracked a smile too.

"Okay!" She pierced her lips, ready for me to come down.

As I brought my head down to meet hers, I could see that her hands had reached the top of her breasts. Our lips collided. And I broke my fingers out and around her underwear. I held the string to the side with one finger and started feeling around with the others. She was almost there. Her tongue came up to meet mine. They brushed by each other as we kissed.

This was going perfect!

I thought to myself, proud that I had made things happen this well. I half expected Koizumi to be crying by now, so the fact she wasn't was quite the accomplishment… for both of us.

Risa Koizumi POV

Oh my gosh, what the heck was going on?!

Everything was happening so fast, but not in a bad way. It was like Otani was washing me away and I didn't care. Maybe I was freaking out a little bit, but I felt way calmer than I thought I would have been in this situation. Otani was kissing me and it felt so good. There was no way I'd be panicking, I loved him way too much to be worried.

I was so focused on our kiss that I didn't really notice Otani's fingers touching me down there. Before I realized it, he was actually touching me! Not just my underwear.

For a second, I thought about kicking him off and yelling, but then my hands just went around my tiny-little boobs. I pressed one hand across my chest and under my bra. There was a lot of extra padding going on. It was kinda tight. Don't tell Otani, but I was wearing a push-up bra. Maybe I did suspect something might happen tonight. Even though it was our first day in Hokkaido.

I couldn't believe we had gotten this far, and that he had told me to essentially touch myself right in front of him. Was he crazy?! And I couldn't believe I was actually doing it. Feeling up my own breasts- when he was right there! Like, he could see me doing it, if he broke away from our kiss.

I must have been crazy too!

I cupped my boob, and my other hand fell down by my side. I brushed by Otani's arm, heading down into my jeans. This all felt so weird, but so calming too- in a crazy, stressed out way.

He pulled away from our kiss. I could feel my head tilt up after him as he left. My eyes fluttered open. Otani was looking down at my legs, then his eyes wandered back up to me.

I was very confused.

Why'd he stop kissing me?

"Wha-what's wrong?" I questioned softly, in an unexpectedly sweet voice.

He shook his head. His sightline went back to his hand in my pants. He looked so cute hanging over me. "Nothing, nothing's wrong." His other hand, the one that was against the bed, came up and brushed my baby hairs out of my face. Otani's eyes met mine. He looked so dreamy. "It's just…" he spoke, "You're so wet."

Instantly, I hid my face in my hands. Pulling them out from under my shirt. My cheeks had to be bright red.

How embarrassing!

Otani laughed. His hand came down to my face. He took my wrist and my hand drew away, revealing my face. "Koizumi, it's okay," he said between teasing laughs.

"No, it's not!" I cried, moving my other hand over my eyes to hide.

"Come on," He comforted me, and I felt another hand come up and grab the one across my face.

When I looked up, Otani was now completely over my body. His knees bent on the bed around each side of my stomach. He held my wrist back, exposing my blushing, embarrassed face. He wore a big smile.

I whined, "It's gross!"

His face fell, more serious, staring down at me, "No, it's not." He shrugged, above me, "Come on, Koizumi, enough with the cute act."

I shook my arms, in the air, held in his hands, "It's not an act!"

"Oh," He gave one little snicker, "Then, you know you're cute, right?"

His face came closer to mine. He was winding me up and he knew it. My heart was about to explode. He had so much control over me.

"Ah!" I turned my head away. "Stop, you're gonna kill me!"

"Haha," He pushed my wrists back, pinning my arms back against the bed. My attention snapped up at him, my eyes wide.

How did he look so cool?

A smug smile across his face and his eyes gleaming. The light hit the back of his hair and shined around him. "I'm not gonna kill you, hehe," he couldn't keep a straight face as he delivered a dumb line, "But I'm gonna take you to heaven."

A smile broke out across my face, how could it not?

We both chuckled, looking at each other, and finally, I said, "Fine."

"What?" He asked.

I rolled my eyes, "I'll take my pants off."

His hands let up. And he let my wrists free. He scooted back, so he was kneeling over my knees. My legs dangled, bent over the side of the bed. He might have touched his feet to the ground, so he could hold himself up.

Instead of really looking at him, I focused on the top of my jeans. I brought my hands down and slid my pants down with them. My thumb caught on the waistband of my underwear for a split second, but I left them there, pulling just my jeans down.

I stopped just before I reached where Otani was. I probably could have taken my pants all the way off with no problem. He wasn't actually sitting on me or blocking my way or anything. But maybe I kinda wanted him to-

"I can help," He stated. His hands coming down to meet the middle of my jeans. He pulled at them, taking them down to my shins. Then, from there, I was able to kick off my pants.

We both kinda cackled. Maybe we were a little nervous. Or maybe the whole situation was just silly at this point.

There I was laying in just my underwear. And I hadn't realized it, but the bottom part was mostly pulled over to one side. He probably saw most of me right then.

Otani leaned forward and he told me, "I'm gonna take these off too."

My eyes shut and I nodded.

I could feel his hands drag my underwear down, along the sides of my legs.

This moment felt so tense for me. Like there he was actually, for real seeing me. I was naked, I mean I still had my shirt on, but this was like basically what naked means. Otani could be looking right at my vagina.

His hands, one cold and one a little warmer from touching me before, fell on my thighs.

"Koizumi…" He spoke, his voice low and kinda husky.

"What?" I asked, my eyes shut.

"Could you look at me, for just a second?"

"Mm…" I groaned and allowed my eyes to peak open.

He was sat up, his head kinda far away, over my body. One of his hands drifted away from my thigh.

His lips kinda puffed out as he informed me, "I'm gonna put a finger in…" His voice trailed off. His head dropped down closer to my hips. He turned his hand around, in front of my private area. He continued, his hot breath hitting my pelvis, "...Try not to cum, just yet."

"Huh?!" I questioned, but he had slipped his middle finger in at the same second, "Ah!" I let out.

"Whoa!" He exclaimed. "Are you good?" He asked looking along my body, up at me.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered, suddenly breathing heavy.

"I'm gonna move around some," He told me, then started to wiggle his finger a bit, inside of me. I had never felt anything like this before. It wasn't like it tickled, you know, but it did feel so weird. It was hard to tell right away if it felt good or not, but he kept going. And I kept letting him.

He pulled his finger out a bit, the lights shined off of it, then he pushed it back in. This time going a little further.

I didn't know how to react anymore. I started to feel kinda crazy, and a bit silly. My head tilted back and my eyes shut. Then, I felt his tongue. He grazed over top another part. I knew my voice was about to sneak out, but I couldn't stop it. I let out an audible moan.

I held my chest. My fist balled up and my eye scrunched closed.

"A little more," He announced to me, taking his finger out completely. His tongue licked down to fill its spot. The sensation of his wet tongue connecting with me down there was too weird to figure out, it was so overwhelming.

"Mm...Otani!" I said suddenly in alarm. It was like I knew my body was on the edge of something. I was aware that my hips had started to buck forward as he moved his tongue around inside of me.

He kept going for another second or two, "Oh," he muttered as he took his head away. He backed himself up, till he was sitting straight again. His butt fell lightly back on the bed, his legs hung over my knees and his calves folded back across my thighs. He didn't feel heavy or anything, so I didn't mind. I bet he was holding himself up a little with his legs too.

Slowly, my eyes opened, "Are you done?" I asked, kinda wanting more.

I watched as he looked around. His eyes spotted the box on the nightstand, then darted back to me.

"Are you ready if we go all the way?"

I held my hands together on my chest, close to my heart. I could have almost started crying right then. I didn't really know the answer. I didn't know if I would ever really feel ready. But, I knew I trusted Otani. And I knew I loved him. And if I ever was going to be ready to do this with anyone, it would be with him.

So, I nodded my head, and sighed, "Yes."

A/N: Alright guys! Hope you liked that chapter! That was a long one. Thanks for reading. Leave a comment and/or Kudos! :) There's still some more story coming.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Warnings: Sexual actions, Sexual language. Mature.

Atsushi Otani POV

"Hmph," she grunted and winced possibly in pain. She flexed up against me, which only made me feel even better.

I groaned, noticeably, "Koi-" I must have opened and closed my eyes a million times. I wanted to look down at her and gauge her reactions so badly, but I also felt like I was going to pass out from pleasure. So badly, I wanted to ask Koizumi how she was doing, if I needed to stop, and if she was hurting or if she was okay. But instead, I just kept pushing forward, laying up across her.

Her long legs wrapped around my calves suddenly and tightly. She gripped onto my forearms, almost to the point of cutting off my circulation, but I let it happen. Between her hard breaths, groans, and grunts, she cried out my name, "Otani!"

My face was just above hers now as I began to lean down. I could hear her weeping my name. In return, I just huffed out. Each pant louder and stronger than the last. I had to keep going.

Her tone got more intense. Her grip was tighter. Her legs clasped up higher on my body. She was wrapping around my thighs, pulling me in. "Otani, Otani, Otani," she called my name over and over again in a frenzy. Not in a way that seemed to require me to stop. But, there was this little fear in my mind that might be what it was.

"Ah!" She blew out in a hot sigh onto my wrist as she turned her head to the side and back again. She moaned, with an almost constipated face, but maybe she was feeling good.

I kept moving on top of her. My motions were short and tight, but my pace was slowly getting faster. I could not contain myself. If she had been asking me to… then I probably would have gone slower or even stopped. But, since from all the signs I was getting, she seemed to be feeling okay, I kept escalating things. And she wasn't telling me otherwise.

"Otani!" She yelled this time, knocking me out of any deep trance. Her eyes were wide and almost panicked.

I backed up a bit. Getting concerned.

Her voice shouted, cracking, "Otani!" She readjusted her hands up onto my back, cupping my shoulder blade and pushing down. It was almost like she was desperately wrapping me back into her.

Suddenly, I saw. All the tension built up in her face faded. Her body jerked.

I felt it. Liquid gushed up against my body. I heard a goopy noise. Man, I wished I would have looked down, but I didn't get to see what happened.

I understood though when her body glided back down, relaxing. Her eyes shut gently.

For a second, after she jerked up against me, I had stopped moving- but, I wasn't done. The tip of my penis still inside her. Like I was stuck inside her, unmoving. It still felt so good. I hadn't come yet, but she had.

Shit.

I fell on my hands, forward on her body. I practically laid on her flat. Her legs unlatched from me and spread across the bed, but my bottom half started moving again.

Embarrassed, I spoke into the bedsheets, forcing my eyes closed. I think I might have shouted, even though I was trying to keep it cool, "I'm sorry!"

She placed her hand on the back of my head, even though most of her body laid lifeless.

And consciously continuing, I let her know, a little softer this time, "I… you feel so good… I'm…" I huffed out long breaths into the sheets between each micro thought, "I'm sorry. I'm about to-"

Her hand rubbed my head, just gently going over the top. I felt her other arm wrap up around me. She let out something in a very quiet, warm whisper, "...Otani."

Violently twisting my head and finding her ear, with desperation, I roared her name, "Koizumi!"

I backed my hips up, then I thrusted my penis deep into her. I held it there, everything frozen and tense for a moment. Hovering there, hovering there, until wow I felt it. I unloaded.

My body collapsed on top of her. My mind was absolutely clear. And in my blissful daze, eyes shut, I spoke into her ear, "I love you."

Risa Koizumi POV

Whoa.

I laid in the bed, at Nobuko's grandmother's guesthouse, Otani sprawled out on top of me. He had just told me he loved me. Flat out. And we had just…

Oh my god.

My eyes drifted shut for a second as we both slowly began to catch our breaths. It was like my thoughts were racing, but nothing was going on in my head.

I didn't care or mind that Otani practically passed out on top of me. In fact, his body being there and his inability to do anything else made me feel a little better. Like I wasn't the only one paralyzed in shock. Like it wasn't just my head trying to make sense of what had just happened.

We had sex.

I knew that, but oh my god, I didn't think it would be like that or even feel like that.

Whoa.

I ran through the last minute or so in my head.

Obviously, Otani's penis had entered me. He pushed it in slowly and carefully, but man was I losing my mind. Otani's hands were pressed down on the bed, above my shoulders. He looked down at me and my body as he continued pushing into me. His penis knocking at my opening.

I'm sure I squinted and looked very uncomfortable. It didn't really hurt that badly, it did some, but it wasn't like I was dry or anything. I was just so scared that at any second it was gonna hurt terribly.

As he got a little further, I winced and one of my hands grabbed onto his forearm.

His head whipped up from our hips to look me in the eyes, "Are you okay?" He spoke quickly with concern. He had stopped moving.

I nodded, biting my lip.

"I can stop," he said.

I shook my head no. I took a deep breath and squeezed my eyes open, I talked with my breath huffing, "It's okay, keep going." My other hand crept up onto his other arm. I felt like I needed him inside me now.

I saw his eyes notice me holding onto him. He chuckled and smirked a little, "Okay."

He pressed into me a bit further.

Then, he stopped moving.

He was staring down at our private parts. "Koizumi," he said delicately, as not to rile me up, "I think you might be…"

That's when I felt it. There was definitely a little more liquid in the equation now. I rolled my eyes, glaring up, past him, at the ceiling "Blood?"

He looked up and nodded, "Mmhmm."

I groaned, annoyed.

"Should I take it out?" He asked, about to move back.

I gripped tighter around his arms, "Wait a second!" I bursted, then tried to calm myself down.

My hands slipped down to his wrists. I could feel him staring at me, but I closed my eyes, hiding my gaze, "You can keep going." I wanted him to keep going.

With all my strength, I attempted to meet his eyes, but I was so embarrassed. My face was probably bright red as I admitted, "It doesn't really hurt that bad."

"Huh?" He glanced his head down at our bodies then back up at me confused, "Really?"

I sighed, "I mean, it does a little, but I didn't even feel that."

"So, I can keep going?" He double-checked even though I already answered that.

"Yeah," I repeated myself, "Keep going."

I don't even know why I wanted him to. It wasn't like him sticking his penis in felt amazing or anything. Maybe I was curious to see how I would feel if we did keep going. Or maybe I was still feeling worked up from what he did before.

He told me his plan, his eyes locked on the pillow above my head, "I'm going to move a little."

"Okay," I gasped out, shutting my eyes tight once again.

He pushed in and out, but just by the smallest amount. His movements started to have a kind of slow rhythm to them, which in a way calmed me down.

Eventually, I peeked my eyes open. I was staring up at his neck and chest over me. I held his wrists, where he was holding himself up by my shoulders. Otani was focused straight ahead. His mouth was open a little bit. He seemed so intense. Like he was trying really hard. I couldn't help but to smile.

I think he might have noticed me watching him. He tilted his head down at me for a second and our eyes matched. His cheeks went red and he whipped his head to the side. I probably also blushed, and I know I closed my eyes almost instantly.

After a long, awkward second, I heard him laugh under his breath. I felt him fill up the space inside of me, like he was getting bigger or something. He said in a cool tone of voice, "Koizumi, you can look at me if you want to."

I could have melted from embarrassment right there.

"Stop!" I mumbled, not wanting him to tease me or anything. I attempted to jokingly cover myself with my elbows, but he must have taken what I said the completely wrong way because suddenly he stopped moving.

"What?" He froze. He lowered himself down across my body, so his head was right above mine. I moved my arms to look at him. His eyes were wide staring down at me. "Are you okay?"

"What?" I asked, confused.

He responded, concerned, "You said to stop. Did it hurt?"

His penis was outside, rubbing up against the top of my crotch, rather than inside of me. Everything felt wet and sloppy.

I shook my head, and might have rolled my eyes, "No, no, I was telling you to stop like making fun of me."

"I wasn't making fun of you!" He raised his voice.

I snapped back up at him, "Well, yeah you were, you were all like 'you can look at me~ Oh~ I'm so hot and cool~'"

"That is NOT what I said! And you were staring at me!"

I kept going, "'I will allow you to admire me, Koizumi~'"

As I was mocking him, I moved my body around a bit, gesturing all willy-nilly. But maybe my bottom half was searching for him.

He gulped and suddenly looked down at his crotch, then back up at me, all tense and serious.

"...What…?" I asked, maybe a little creeped out.

His eyes darted side to side. He backed up, bringing the tip of his penis down to the edge of my vagina. He held there at the opening. I could feel the pressure building up.

"What's going on?!" I yelled a little mad. Why wouldn't he just put it back inside me?

"Nothing!" He glared down at me. "Can I keep going?"

"Yeah!" I shouted back, "I never actually told you to stop, remember?"

He growled.

We were so romantic.

But, just then, his eyelids shut slowly. He leaned forward on his hands again and shoved his penis back inside me. The sudden action made my jerk back in response. I gasped and moaned out of reflex. He felt bigger than before. Then he told me, avoiding eye contact, and lowering his voice, "You can move too."

His change in tone made me calm and a bit shy again. "Okay…" I hesitated to say this next part, but I was really confused about what I was feeling, "...But you're getting so big inside of me."

He started moving again, pulling out and pushing in just the slightest bit. He gave out in a chuckle, "Really?"

"Yeah," I stared out at his chest, his collarbone.

"It feels like you got smaller."

And then he pushed in and pressed up, which let me tell you, felt so strange. In the best way possible. It was like for a moment it kind of stung in a surprising way. But then, any sort of pain faded away and it just felt so good. Like he was pressing in just the right spot. I didn't want him to stop, I wanted him to stay right there.

I jerked my hips up, without even thinking… or overthinking if I should.

Everything I did from there on out just felt like my body's reactions. I could hear Otani's voice getting more huffy and maybe I could make out him panting, but I was so focused on how I was feeling.

I did not want that sensation to go away. I think my legs wrapped around him. And I was probably pushing my body up towards him, but I also really wanted him to come down. But, honestly, I couldn't really think about anything, besides how much I wanted him in general. It's embarrassing as hell to admit, but I know I was saying his name over and over again. And I was gripping his hands so tight, he must have had marks on his wrists the next day.

I had never felt this feeling in my life before, and I was so excited to be feeling it with him. Not even for a second in the moment was I like, "I hope Otani is feeling this good," which is totally self-centered and I feel pretty bad about it after. I couldn't help myself. It was like a wave brushed over me. I couldn't think straight.

And then, I felt it. The pleasure I was experiencing reached its tipping point. All the tension in my body released. I flopped back down on the bed. I felt exhausted. My eyes shut. I felt so at peace I could have fallen asleep right there.

But, then I felt Otani crash down on top of me. Not in a way that hurt or anything, but suddenly his body was pressed up against mine. I opened my eyes to see him. His face was hidden over my shoulder, his arms up behind me. He whispered away from me, something that sounded like, "...sorry."

What was he sorry for that felt so good…?

He moved inside of me again.

Huh?

And then I realized.

Oh, he's not done!

I was so focused on myself and how I was feeling I didn't notice that Otani was not at the peak like me yet.

"I… you feel so good… I'm..." He spoke into the sheets, moving his hips faster than before. "I'm sorry! I'm about to-"

I didn't really get what he kept apologizing for. I did not care if he needed a little more time. I mind it was a little weird I guess since I felt done, but if things were reversed… I probably would have wanted to keep going.

He didn't have to be sorry.

I placed my hand on the back of his head. I wanted to let him know it was alright. I was so tired, I probably couldn't speak. My eyes almost glazed over. But, he was so cute. His breath panting all hot and heavy. "Otani…" I managed to let out, even though I had wanted to say how much I loved him.

Then, he turned his head and brought his lips close to my ear. In a loud voice, he huffed, "Koizumi!" With one last big push into me, Otani hit his tipping point. He held himself there, his body finally relaxing and letting off steam.

He collapsed on top of me, entirely. His body was as dead as mine. And then he said it, he said it right into my ear, "I love you."

Oh my gosh, I could have died.

A/N: There you have it, folks! Their first time, yay! I still have a few more chapters written and I'll see if I keep going... maybe. Let me know what you thought of this chapter, thanks for reading as always!


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter warnings: Not much, just some sexual references. Kind of a filler chapter, to get to the next scene, sorry! Hope you still like it.

Risa Koizumi POV

"You guys did it the first night here?!" Nobuko screamed in shock when I told her. "You couldn't wait? Not even Darling and I did it last night, and we haven't seen each other in months! You're crazy, Risa!"

"What? I thought you'd be proud of me." I slinked back in the deck chair I was sitting in on her grandmother's porch. "How did you even know?"

"Come on it was so obvious the way you two walked out this morning." She might have had a point.

Stepping out of the guesthouse this morning both of us were waving across the field at Nakao and Nobuko on the porch. We ran up to them smiling, we probably looked so goofy.

And then, when Otani said, "Good morning!" I couldn't help but start giggling. It was so funny that we had sex last night and they didn't know. It was like our dirty little secret.

Otani giggled with me.

"What…" Nobuko mumbled, staring blankly at us.

Nakao smiled and grabbed Otani's shoulder, "Come on. Let's get the bikes."

"Okay," Otani said through his giggling. "Bye ladies!" He waved as Nakao dragged him away.

I laughed, but Nobuko wasn't having any of it.

"You had sex," she stated like it wasn't a question.

"What?! No?!"

She glared down at me, "Risa…"

"Ok fine," our secret lasted all of two seconds.

Nobuko sighed, putting her head in her hand, "Whatever, Risa." She patted my back and stepped down off the porch. "I am proud of you."

I gave her a thumbs-up, "Thanks!" She took a seat on the steps. I leaned up against one of the pillars going up to the roof. "So what did you and Nakao do last night?"

She narrowed her eyes, staring forward. The boys were walking back towards us, pulling a bike at their sides. She spoke, haunted, "We played board games with my grandmother…"

Nakao smiled, "And I won!" He pulled a bike up to the stairs, near Nobuko. He held it out to her, "Here you go."

"Thank you, Darling," she cheered up.

Otani turned his head, he peered up at me. He stopped the bike, "Do you want this one?"

"You're not gonna pedal me?" I joked, innocently.

He squinted, "You're not gonna pedal for me?"

"Haha," I chuckled, hopping down the stairs to take the bike from him. He rolled it towards me. My hand graced his as we made the trade-off. Nakao walked off to get a bike for himself, after giving away the first one to Nobuko. Otani ran to follow behind him. "We better take it slow, don't wanna tire ourselves out!" I shouted after him, mostly trying to make a pun, but… Maybe I was doing a little bit of flirting.

Otani turned back and waved his arm out to me, "Right! We gotta pump the breaks!"

He jogged away from us, over to Nobuko and the garage with the bikes.

Nobuko glanced over at me, with a smirk on her face and a knowing look in her eyes. She stated, with pride, "Oh, you two definitely had sex."

"Stop…" I hid my face, letting my head fall on my arms on top of the handlebars of the bike. But, I most definitely had a big grin across my face. We did have sex. And Otani and I loved each other so much.

Atsushi Otani POV

So, I didn't tell Nakao anything. But he probably knew. Maybe there was the smallest chance he thought I wasn't a virgin before. But he probably knew. He was my best friend and a great guy. I've known him since middle school. He basically always knew what was going on in my life better than I did. Hell, he knew Koizumi liked me way before I ever figured it out.

I ran up to him at the garage entrance. We lifted the door up together, and he held it for me to sneak under, nodding slightly for me to go through. I grabbed one of the bikes and rolled it under the door. Placing the bike up against the side of the garage wall, I was able to switch places with him. I held the door up and he crotched under to get the last bike we needed.

Today, we were going to bike around and sightsee with the girls. Yeah, we both had girlfriends. Not to brag. My girlfriend was kind of a nutjob.

I stretched out before picking up the bike again. "Aah! I wonder what we're gonna do..." I said as I cracked my neck.

Nakao replied simply, "I don't know, baby's got a lot planned."

"Hmm," I gave a nod, "I'm sure it'll be fun!"

I guess he could tell I was in a good mood. He probably knew because he said, "Happy today?"

He looked at me through side-eyes. I peeked over at him, not actually wanting to answer at all.

Suspiciously, I responded, "Sure…"

"Okay."

His plain, blank face felt like it was probing me. The nothing tone of his voice and the vacant stare, but I was strong. I wasn't going to let him know. Or I at the very least was not going to admit just exactly what I did last night. Well, what my girlfriend and I did last night.

Haha.

Koizumi and I went all the way.

Is that what you wanted to hear Nakao?! I'll never come clean!

He said to me, as we rolled the bikes across the yard, closer to the girls, "Nice day, huh?"

I glared at him, and spoke mockingly and aggressively, "Yeah, it is!"

He chuckled.

Koizumi and Nobuko were chatting and giggling. They turned out to look at us. Both of them were holding the bikes we brought them.

Suddenly, Nobuko pointed at me. "Hey Otani," She called out. Koizumi moved to stop her, but Nobuko talked anyway, "Have a good night last night?"

I hit the brakes on the bike and stopped short.

"Nobu!" Koizumi screamed, blushing.

"Wha…" I muttered, stunned. Quickly, I tried to regain my composure. Sharply, I put my hand on my hip, holding the bike with one hand, and starring both girls down, "You know what? I did."

And the girls burst out laughing.

Even though they were probably all making fun of me, it was worth it to see Koizumi smile. I'm glad she was happy after everything that happened. I couldn't help but feel a little bit proud of myself. I mean, I was a man now, right?

Last night it was our first time. It was my first time, and it was definitely her first time. She wasn't calm and cool under pressure, it was pretty easy to tell she wasn't experienced. Plus, I also knew I was her first real boyfriend so… there's that too.

Last night was so amazing. I was a lucky guy. Sure, it probably would have looked messy and stupid to anyone else. We weren't the most attractive or most graceful couple. There were definitely things I could have done better, not to grade myself or my performance. Koizumi was still satisfied, right? That's gotta be like bonus points for achieving during a girl's first time.

Jeez, I'm talking like that video game nerd.

I felt a little bad that I kept going after she climaxed, but at the same time, I felt pretty proud of myself that she came first. What can I say?

At the end of it all, I reminded Koizumi how much I love her. It's not like I never say those words out loud. I have told her something along those lines before, "I love you a lot more than I thought I did," remember that? But… then again I told her I was tired from studying and I didn't mean the words I said… So… maybe I don't outright tell Koizumi, my girlfriend, I love her very often. Maybe I will let her have this one. Without taking it back.

Maybe.

I do love her. It just feels so gushy and corny to tell her that stuff. Every time she says that kind of stuff to me, I want to disappear. It's so embarrassing.

Can't we just hang out together all the time, kiss, have sex, get married, have kids, and never say "I love you" once? Wouldn't that just be easier?

Not saying I actually want to get married or anything. Okay?!

Koizumi is a freak, who'd want to deal with that their whole life?

Not me, alright?!

God. Koizumi had really found a way of taking up all my thoughts, huh?

"Otani!" Nobuko snapped. Everyone was sitting on their bikes already, and I was just standing there like an idiot.

"Come on, slow-poke!" Koizumi teased.

"I'm not slow!" I fought back, "I'll beat you there!" I threw one leg over the bike, which I may or may not have had to put the seat down for.

She pointed at me, "Not a chance. You're on!" Koizumi stood up on the bike pedals ready to kick off. I also got in position, moving my bike up next to her, so we could kick off from the same place.

Together we counted down, "Ready, set-"

"Hold on you guys!" Nobuko shouted, both of us flopping back on the bike seats, "You don't know where we're going."

Koizumi and I turned to each other, clueless, "Oh, right."

So, our race was called off. And we had to lamely bike behind Nobuko the whole time.

After parking and locking up our bikes, we all walked around town. We also went down a trail that went along the lake. It looked really cool. And I was sure to let Koizumi know what I thought, practically yelling, "Whoa! That's so cool!" and "Oh my gosh, look at that!"

We passed a mountain that had craters taken out of it. When we passed the first crater, Koizumi leaned down to me and popped in my ear, "Boom!"

"Ah!"

"Boom! Boom!" She continued.

I shooed her away, laughing, "What are you doing?"

"I'm simulating the explosion."

"No," I shook my head, grinning at her, "You're being annoying."

She jumped at me, and flicked her fingers in my face, "Boom!"

I started getting playfully annoyed, "I'll boom you, honey!"

And in a split second, I decided to tackle her. I grabbed around her waist and pushed her over to the side of the path, before taking her down on the grass. We were both hysterically laughing. We probably looked really stupid. In a final move, I pinned her wrists back.

Then, I stood up. Koizumi laid on her back on the ground, her knees bent up. "I win."

She chuckled, looking up at me, "Sure."

"Will you too stop it?!" Nobuko shouted, coming from down the path.

Koizumi started to get up. She shook her head with a big smile on her face, and answered Nobuko, "Probably not,"

I chimed in, taking Koizumi's hand and helping her stand up, "Yeah, probably not."

Nobuko rolled her eyes, but we just kept goofing around.

Risa Koizumi POV

As we walked along the lake path, the four of us eventually came out on the other side of town. Nobuko cursed, "Crap! I thought this let out where we came in."

So, now we had to walk all the way through town to get back to our bikes again. But, I think Nobuko actually planned this. On the phone, she mentioned trying to get the boys to take us shopping… Having to walk through the city with a bunch of touristy huts set up seemed like the perfect way to do that, to me. She was so crafty.

"Whoa!" I heard Otani's voice gasp.

I turned, "What?" His eyes were wide, staring across the street.

He hit at my arm, absent-mindedly, "Look, Koizumi, there's models!" He pointed forward, and there they were. Some sort of shot must have been happening. There were about five young, attractive girls posing for a summer magazine or something.

"Oh, wow," Nakao muttered, joining Otani.

"We should check it out," Otani stated, starting forward to cross the street.

"Yeah," Nokao agreed.

Nobuko protested, throwing her fists down, "Hey, you guys, I have plans, remember?!"

Otani waved her off, keeping his eyes locked on the modeling, "But we're lost right now."

"Hey!" I yelled, "Don't be rude, Otani!"

He turned to me, rolling his eyes, "Sorry, sorry, I just wanna see what's going on." Nakao nodded, backing him up silently. "Let's go!" Otani pulled Nakao with him, as both boys crossed the street.

"What the heck?!" Nobuko confided in me.

I agreed with her.

We're our boys really that blinded by pretty girls?

It made me feel kinda bad. I mean, why was Otani so excited to go look at a bunch of models working? Nakao was probably just going along with him. He was so obviously in love with Nobuko. But with Otani, I never really knew for sure. He did say he loved me last night though… Maybe I was overthinking everything.

The boys made it across the street, they gathered around the photoshoot with a bunch of other tourists. Otani looked back, he called out to me, "Koizumi! Come on!"

He had such a stupid, bright smile on his face. I had to go over.

Standing next to him, my mind was still going crazy. We were both watching the models pose and the photographers snapping their pictures. Those girls were so pretty and the outfits they were wearing were so cool. I could never pull off those kinds of sexy looks.

"Hey, isn't this-" Otani started, but I was lost in my thoughts. I felt him grab my hand and I turned my head to look at him. He suddenly seemed concerned, "You okay?"

I couldn't lie to him. My stomach was turning. "Would you rather have a super pretty girlfriend like one of them?"

"What…" His face went blank.

"Well, would you?" I questioned further.

His eyes narrowed at me, "Would I like to date a hot model, is that what you're asking?"

I bite my lip, "Yeah…"

He puffed himself up, rolling his shoulders back proudly, "Yup. I would."

Ouch.

"What?! Are you being serious?" I moved my whole body around to face him. He was still holding on to my hand and he was wearing a big smirk across his face. "Why are we dating then, if you're just waiting for somebody better to come along?"

He chuckled to himself. His head shook, "What?"

"Answer me, I am being serious okay?!"

He bulked, and spoke smoothly, "Koizumi, I don't think anybody better than you is gonna come along."

I squeezed his hand, "Huh?"

"I don't think I'll ever get along with anybody like I get along with you."

"Oh…" I shifted my eyes away from him, feeling a little ashamed for being such an insecure girlfriend.

"For the record," He mentioned, "I wanted to come over here, so you could look at the modeling set," I eyed over him, he leaned his head in pointedly, "Because you're gonna be a designer, remember?"

Rolling my eyes, I apologized, "Yeah, yeah, sorry. You don't need to tease me now though."

"Sure I do," He cackled, and mocked me, "Do I wanna date a model? No thanks, man, then my stupid ugly not-a-model girlfriend would cry."

"Shut up!" I let go of his hand and folded my arms across my chest.

"You're such a dummy, Koizumi."

"You're dumb," I mumbled.

But, he continued, "I'm not gonna leave you for anybody else. Especially not the day after." His eyes glowed, looking up at me.

"I know," I grumbled, "You're a nice guy."

"No, I'm a cool guy!" He said proudly.

A/N: Hey guys! Thank you for reading. Leave a comment and/or kudos! The updates are going to be a little slower because I'm catching up to what I have already written. I need to write more. Haha. Thanks again!


	16. Chapter 16

A/N Hey guys! Sorry, it's been a little while, but hopefully, I'll get writing again. I finished the last (bonus) chapter of Love Com, so now I know a little bit about college life for Otani... We're just gonna say this story is post-"chappy" Otani, but maybe I'll mention it. Look out for some college references now haha. Enjoy!

Risa Koizumi POV

"We'll meet for dinner at 7!" Nobuko playfully yelled to us as our two couples parted ways. Otani and I went to the guesthouse.

"Can you take one of these stupid bags?" He asked me, with some attitude, as he hovered by the front door.

"Why? I thought you were doing the manly thing and carrying them?" I teased, sticking my chin up.

"Because I need to get the key out of my pocket, idiot."

"Oh," I grabbed one of the shopping bags from his hands.

As he dug around for the key and went to unlock the door, he retorted, "I did the 'manly' thing and paid for everything."

The door opened, "Well, it's because you love me so much right?"

He looked back at me as he stepped in, "Who are you again?"

"Otani…"

A smile lit up across his face. I chucked the bag at him. He caught it, of course, the stupid former basketball player, and I walked into the living room. The door shutting behind me.

"So," he started, "We have like an hour, what do you wanna do?"

What a leading question. That had to be a trap!

He put all the bags down near the doorway.

"I don't know, what do you-"

He stopped me, "No, that's not fair. Come on I asked you." His hands went on his sides.

I objected, "Huh? What? That's not fair! You're trying to get me to say I want to do sexy things and I don't want to say that!" My voice was loud and heated.

Otani was clearly taken aback, he chuckled to himself, "No, that's not what I was trying to do. It was just a question." He laughed at me more and I started to feel embarrassed.

"What…?"

He sat back on the head of the couch, facing me, a prideful air around him. Otani had such a way of poking at me. It was so annoying. "So, it was good?" He rephrased his question in a matter of seconds, "Like you would do it again?"

"Huh?"

I stood motionless in the middle of the room, in the gap between the living room and kitchen.

"Come on," his gestures let on a hint of frustration, "I just want to know if I was good or not!"

I lightened up, beginning to understand, "If you were good?"

"Yeah…" He looked away, a slight blush coming to his cheeks, "I thought you felt good, but… it was also pretty rude of me to keep going… I'm really sorry," his eyes were looking over the lines of the couch. His head was almost shaking like his brain was working a mile a minute "I just… I didn't think you were gonna cum first-"

"Otani!" I raised my voice and he popped his head back up to me. "I'm not mad about that!"

"But you could be."

I narrowed my eyes, like a disappointed parent, "You weren't done right? I don't care if it takes you a few more seconds than me."

He was intense. There was this weird energy coming from him, he's never usually this serious. "I could have hurt you, it was stupid I kept going."

"You didn't hurt me…?" Now, I was confused. I went over to him. I took his hands away from the anxious mess they were sitting in his lap. "Otani, you were good. It felt good. I mean it, and when you said you loved me at the end I was really happy."

He grabbed onto my hands, "I know, it was kind of selfish of me. I feel guilty."

"Why?"

"I wanted to make you feel good last night- pay you back, remember?"

I stared into his eyes, "Well, I want to make you feel good too!" I pulled up on his hands, standing up straighter, speaking confidently, "I know you care about me, and I know you would never hurt me, so I don't care what you do. I'm just happy to be spending time with you. You can do whatever you want to me!"

A little laugh.

A facepalm and a shrug,

And he was cheering up.

He gulped and bugged his eyes out at me, "Oh my god, Koizumi."

"What...?" I huffed.

"Don't say that," he stood up, brushing past me. Our hands still connected, so I spun around after him. "There's a lot of guys who would take advantage of you after saying something like that."

"But, I mean it," I said in a whimper, not getting what was so bad.

He told me through laughter, "I know you mean it, that's the problem idiot." His head shook, "Let's just sit on the couch for a little bit, okay Miss Use-my-body-however-you-want."

"Hey!" I yelled as he tugged on my hand, bringing me over to the couch. "I didn't mean it like that!"

"That's how you said it," He chuckled, flopping back down.

As we sat next to each other he informed me, "Also, by the way," his free hand went to his forehead and his eyes squinted, "I had lotion or lube or whatever, but I didn't think we needed it…" his voice trailed off, and then he insecurely asked me. "...Did it hurt?"

"What?" I responded, "I already told you, you didn't hurt me-"

"No," he rolled his eyes, flopping his head over to look at me. "I mean did it like… Um… I don't know… For you, was it like… dry?" His hand gestures and shrugging were all over the place. I really had no idea what he was talking about, and I don't think he knew either.

"Dry?!"

He sighed to himself, reassured, "Yeah, you're right. You definitely weren't dry."

"Um… Hey, what?"

He smirked at me, his head tilted a bit sideways as he looked over at me across the couch. He seemed so smug.

"What are you so proud of?"

"Either you're really easy to please or I'm good~"

I was starting to get a little offended, but mostly I was still just lost, "Hey! What does that mean? And I already told you, you were good!"

He tightened his grip around my hand, and picked it up to rest on his leg. He had a great big smile across his face, I could see it clear as day. He was such a weird little man. I hated how in love with him I was. Well, I didn't hate it, but you get the point.

"Yeah, I'm good," it was like he was drawing me in closer, without even trying, "But you were pretty good too Koizumi, even if there still is a lot I gotta teach you…"

"What are you talking about…" I leaned in closer and closer to him. His head sideways, waiting for me to meet him. "I'm so much smarter than you-" My lips fell onto his, subconsciously and happily. Oh man, were we gonna have sex again?

Atsushi Otani POV

I wish I could have played it cool. I wish I could have acted with 100% confidence and certainty that I was the most perfect partner last night. But… I knew I probably wasn't. And I knew I wasn't good at lying.

Part of me realized I was being a needy boyfriend, asking Koizumi to reassure me like that, and that part of me knew I sounded wimpy and annoying. At the same time though, I really needed Koizumi to know that I was not some asshole who didn't care about how she was feeling.

Ugh, I knew the truth. I should have stopped after she came last night. But, I didn't… Man, it just felt too good. I never felt anything like that before.

Koizumi wasn't mad at me, so maybe it wasn't that bad. She also did not really know what we were talking about. I guess I just felt so guilty because usually, the guy comes first right? And then, as a good partner or whatever, that guy would go down on her until maybe, eventually, she climaxed. I thought it was supposed to be hard.

Getting Koizumi to that point wasn't hard.

Sure, it was a little awkward and it took some planning. I used a lot of brain power trying to figure out exactly how to approach and escalate things. It took effort, but it wasn't hard.

Honestly, I thought it was going to be more challenging than it was. I was prepared to spend more time pleasing her if I needed to. I really did bring lube if she really wanted to have sex, but wasn't physically ready. But.. when I started fingering her, I sort of figured I could just get her wet enough. Like she was almost there already, I just needed to do a little more work.

I should've asked her if she wanted to use the lube. That was stupid and kinda cocky of me.

In the end, I knew Koizumi was okay with what happened. She probably actually enjoyed herself- I just did not want her thinking I was using her. And there she went saying things like, "You can do whatever you want to me!"

Man, she was crazy!

She pulled away from our little afternoon makeout session on the couch. My eyes flickered open. I folded my lip under my teeth and my tongue. We had really been doing a lot lately. It's like her taste was all over me. Suddenly it was harder to go through the weekdays at school without her.

Her shoulders dropped and she gave me a faint smile, one of sympathy, "Are you okay now?"

"Huh?" I questioned, staring out at her, wide-eyed.

"It's funny, it was like you were freaking out for once and not me. I didn't know what to do," she giggled to herself and flipped her hair back.

I let out a long sigh, "Yeah, I'm okay." I took her hands, by her wrists, and swung and flipped her arms over as I talked, "I want to make you feel good… again.".

"Again?"

"Yes, again," I rolled my eyes, even though I was looking down at our arms entangled between us. We were facing each other more on the couch than when we had started kissing. One of my knees was up on the cushion and Koizumi's body was basically turned to me.

"Hey, Otani," she spoke like she was starting a conversation, but I was pretty sure we were in the middle of one.

"Yeah?" I responded anyway.

"Can I ask you a question?"

I folded my other leg up on the couch, making my body face her. "I guess."

She gave me a stern look, "Really."

I sighed again, this time for her sake, "Okay," My hands slipped down her wrists to hold onto her's, "What is it?"

"Is that not normal? I only really saw one thing of my brother's, but the guy did… first… So, I'm just wondering- Did I do something wrong?"

What?!

I was stunned. God, I'm an idiot, making her worry like this. I tightened my grip around her hands and pulled myself in closer to her. "Oh my god, no!" She moved back slightly. "You didn't do anything wrong- You were good too. I'm..."  
She chuckled, but kind of ashamed and sadly as she darted her eyes away from me, "But I did finish first…"

Shit.

I breathed out, "Koizumi, it's alright really. You're probably just sensitive."

"Sensitive?!" She balked, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Her hands ripped away from me. So, one my hands found a good place on my forehead.

"No, not like emotional- which you are anyway, by the way- like your body might just be sensitive."

She squinted, making a disgusting face, "Huh? How do you know about all this…" A finger waved at me suspiciously.

"What?" I jumped back in my seat, "I don't really know that much…"

"Sure you do! You keep talking about stuff I barely know anything about. I mean you had like all the moves last night."

"I did?"

"Shut up!" She yelled, half-actually yelling at me, and half-teasing me, "You go from doing one thing and then be on the next before I even realized it. Before I even had a chance to get nervous!" Her squint got more intense, "How did you know how to do all that, huh?"

"What are you getting at?!" I held my hands up in defense. "I never did this with my ex-girlfriend, okay?!"

"Sure you didn't!" She hissed.

"Koizumi!" I raised my voice louder, shaking my hands out in front of me, "Last night was my first time!'

Suddenly, she chilled out. Everything about her got a little softer as she sunk back into the couch. "Really?"

"Yes," I admitted it, there was no going back now.

"But… it really seemed like you knew what you were doing," her head flopped back on the couch, her legs shifting forward. I let my head fall too.

Staring up at the ceiling I told her "Well, I didn't… I was just doing my best."

"Then, you were really good."

Maybe she was being totally serious, but all I could hear was mockery and sarcasm.

"Nah, you are just easy to please."

A fist hit my stomach, lightly, "Stop it!"

I laughed, taking hold of her arm and tugging on her to boost myself up. I flipped over on the couch, so I was kneeling above her.

"Heh," I let out, practically pinning her. "I can show you what I mean."

"...What?"

"When I said you're sensitive, remember?" She nodded, her lips pressed together, almost into a smile, "Well, really I think your boobs are sensitive." At that moment, in my mind, I was speaking like a highly-educated scientist.

"My boobs?'

"Yes, that's why I kinda suggested you touch yourself when I was feeling you down there," I revealed part of last night's master plan.

Koizumi tilted her head, still not really getting it. She wasn't yet at my level of genius. "You thought that would make me feel better?"

I nodded my head, amused, "Yeah, more or less." I slipped one of my hands away and over to her breasts. She watched me move, never stopping me, as my hand landed on her. "When I say you're sensitive, I just think you get turned on more easily by your-"

She let out a laugh, strangely. Her hand grabbed mine over her boob, "That might be true," She said, "But, you're so stupid, I get 'turned on' by you."

"No, I'm pretty sure it's your boobs-" It took my brain a second to process what she was saying to me. I was distracted by the fact I was touching her boob, that's not fair. And when I actually realized what she said, my brain started short-circuiting.

"Otani, thanks for trying to figure me out and what would make me feel the best," her arms wrapped around me, pulling me into a hug. My head crashed down on her chest. "This is what I mean when I say you're a good guy."

I was thinking of a million smart comebacks I could have said, but instead, I just let out my breath and closed my eyes. I leaned down on her, allowing myself to get lost in her hug.

"I love you. I really do." She told me.

Koizumi might tell me all the time how much she loves me, but it was still nice to hear it. I couldn't help but smile, being held in her arms. This crazy girl will bring up my ex-girlfriend all the time, but I don't think she has any idea of how much I need her. More than any other girl before.

A/N: Let me know if you liked this chapter by leaving a review! Thanks for reading!!!


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